Another fucking no-brainer

Jennifer Lopez was voted The most beautiful Woman in the world.  This of course proves that this award is pretty much for sale.  No way J-lo ever beats out Sophia Vergara, Brooklyn Decker, Carla Gugino, Beyonce, ALMOST ANYONE ELSE!  I like that J-lo spends an estimated 4 Milllion dollars a year on hair and makeup for American idol, and still comes out on tv in gharish make up and horrible sequined outfits. She is short, fat, orange, brainless round, and full of hot air.  She is basically a basketball.  This award is as for sale as the footprints in front of Groman's Chinese Theatre The Nobel Peace Prize, or the star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Thats right, she makes 10M, Plus an extra 4M in hair and makeup.  Why can't we tax the shit out of her and leave my piddly paychecks alone?

From my skincare regimen to my grueling workouts and portion-controlled diet, Lopez says she makes a concerted effort to stay in top form. "The thing is, it's part of my job," says the singer, who ran a half-marathon six months after she gave birth. "I don't want anybody thinking it's easy. It does take time and it's hard work. HDTV wide-screen is nobody's friend!  People forget that since I am not popular, recording,talented,  doing any concerts, or special apperances, and was super fat, I had to get in shape if I ever had any hope of not fading into obscurity.  Its tough to wake up at noon, do a half hour of cardio, have my chef cook up gourmet meals, and  go designer shopping every day.  Sometimes I can only shop for 3-4 hours.  I am lucky to get my 12 hours of sleep in!!!!!  "


People like Gwenwth Paltrow, Jennifer Anniston, J-Lo don't get it.  They are not beloved becuase no one takes them seriously.  Paltrow makes diet recommendations like "Have your personal cook with Australian lemons."  I have had them, they are tasty, but also unrealistic for common people such as you, the readers of my blog,  These rich types do nothing all day except diet, work out and have people shop, cook, think , and make decisions for them.  So thereyou have it. If you’re not a millionaire like Gwenth is, it’s because you’re lazy. With a little effort You too could have had parents who are Hollywood royalty like her acting parents and her godfather Steven Spielberg would have given you your first role as Wendy in Hook. When Gwyeth Paltrow started acting, she had nothing but 10 million dollars, connections, and a dream. It really is an inspiring story.  Fact is. there is a team J-lo in place to ensure she buys awards like these.  The ghettos are teeming with big-assed women, but without the stylist teams, rich acting parents, and millions of dollars, they do not stand a chance.  So to J-Lo, Gwen, jennifer anniston, and the likes, a big. hearty FUCK YOU goes out from me to you.    In other news, Derrick Rose will win NBA MVP, The Government will raise taxes, and people will continue to die every day from now until the end of recorded time.  This is especially true if you live in Japan.