This is mainly for my women...and some of the men out there who have been bamboozled...led a stray..run a amok...and who had Plymouth Rock land of them. Here is my second installment of ... iz3y's crazy theories: "why hate the player...hate the game"
1. If guy is an asshole or a girl is a bitch...it is highly likely that is not changing. Because they light some candles or take u to dinner, or go down on u in the restaurant the way u like it, does not make them perfect for you. IT doesnt wash away the mark of evil they have on their scalp. Why oh why do people think they can change muthafuckas...they cant! He/She came in an evil spawn, barring life changing events (and those dont include u being a great person) they are going to die evil spawns! YOU CAN'T CHANGE THEM...i can't stress this enough.
2. The Multiple personality one is trickier...these are the fools who come in like Mrs Cleaver or wearing the Super girl outfit to suck you in. Women, this is the guy who plays guitar, and is nice to his mom. This person is a fucking trap. The signs are subtle but they are there!!! For instance...while they are being all nice and shit, they suddenly pop off because you want to help them prepare food in the kitchen. Or you tell them you're going out with friends and BOOM..."oh for real...i thought we would go out...oh...well have fun...be safe...call me...i could always just go with you". It may seem sweet at the time, but really that is their crazy/evil rising up like liquid hot magma and steaming just a little. Over time, they cant supress it until u have a raging fucking volcano on ur hands and ur asking yourself...how the fuck did i get here? Well simple..you ignored the signs!
3. the Sucker punch...oh...this one isnt so bad because while it hurts the sting isnt so bad. The sucker punch is person who is cool, so u hang out. Simple, easy, refreshing...you feel like you could one day really like this person. Then after a couple, they hit you with..."I mean lets not get serious...we're not REALLY Dating..." after you find out they are calling/texting/im-ing half the city. Oh the sucker punch is funny because they are right. You were never dating...so they kept on their grind, your ass just forgot!
in the immortal words of OMAR from 'The Wire', "the game is the game!"
reporting live from the field,
-iz3y!
Underworld - Dark and Long (dark Train)
Showing posts with label crazy theories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label crazy theories. Show all posts
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Monday, August 3, 2009
iz3y's crazy theories: "Why do people get all stressed out and whiney over stupid shit!"
This is a new segment of the show I like to call, "iz3y spouts off his crazy theory!" Basically, i am a know-it-all who believes that through my years of TV and sitting in on gossip circles, I have been able to break down certain things and explain away the mysteries of the universe. This week, we have: "Why do people get all stressed out and whiney over stupid shit!"
1. I think most people just cant handle life for whatever reason. Maybe mommy and daddy did everything for them or they never hugged them enough. Who knows? Quite possibly they didn't get that Barbie/ G.I. Joe they always wanted and now feel like every single thing that doesn't go their way is a calamity on the Titanic scale. I am quite certain they feel like the universe is conspiring to get them, and only them, and the spotlight only shines brighter and hotter on their issue. Why oh why does this happen to them.
2. People are just egocentric and just don't realize the universe does not revolve around them. Most of these people I don't think played team sports or had a coach teach them that u need to fit into the team picture, and the big picture in general. I am also very certain they believe they are a snowflake, unique, original, and very fragile. What people forget is that, just like a unique and fragile snowflake, they ultimately become part of the pile on the ground. Some even become yellow snow...so deal with it.
3. Finally, some people just suck. They know they suck but figure if they talk enough they will become interesting. They have figured out that freaking out makes them interesting so they make sure to freak out at all times if possible.
fitfully urs,
-iz3y!
Chromeo - Fancy Footwork
1. I think most people just cant handle life for whatever reason. Maybe mommy and daddy did everything for them or they never hugged them enough. Who knows? Quite possibly they didn't get that Barbie/ G.I. Joe they always wanted and now feel like every single thing that doesn't go their way is a calamity on the Titanic scale. I am quite certain they feel like the universe is conspiring to get them, and only them, and the spotlight only shines brighter and hotter on their issue. Why oh why does this happen to them.
2. People are just egocentric and just don't realize the universe does not revolve around them. Most of these people I don't think played team sports or had a coach teach them that u need to fit into the team picture, and the big picture in general. I am also very certain they believe they are a snowflake, unique, original, and very fragile. What people forget is that, just like a unique and fragile snowflake, they ultimately become part of the pile on the ground. Some even become yellow snow...so deal with it.
3. Finally, some people just suck. They know they suck but figure if they talk enough they will become interesting. They have figured out that freaking out makes them interesting so they make sure to freak out at all times if possible.
fitfully urs,
-iz3y!
Chromeo - Fancy Footwork
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