Conducted over Several Days December 2008
There are some assignments that when you get them, you head straight to a bar and grab the ting tong tiddliest drink they have. This is one of those moments where moments pass slowly, and the ticks on the clock seem to take longer than normal. Still, I have a duty to my fellow man, and that is to get the tough interviews. My job is to go where no man dare go, and give u a glimpse inside the minds of the special. We have had the Air Marshall who didn’t like to fly. I have given u insight into a truly unique personality from Colombia. You were with me when I walked into the den of iniquity known as the Casa de Schweez. Today though I go further down the rabbit hole to interview a man who represents the essence of enigma. A human being who stretches the mere definition of that word.
Today ladies and Gentleman, I give you Omar Juarez, philanthropist, dictator of his realm, and humanitarian.
NAME: Omar Juarez
Nicknames: O, JokeyJokeMaker, Rafael De La Ghetto, the Handsome RightHander, FOmar
Born: February 21, 1977, Planet unknown
HomeTown: JOKEY WORLD (physically: Chicago)
Occupation: Unknown…
INTRO:
Me: So, I see you have a throne…
O: FUCK U…u hear me…FUCK U!
ME: I didn’t even get my question out.
O: Oh…something about my throne…ask me about my Shoes.
ME: Why would I ask u about ur shoes?
O: So my throne was hand made by the elves of the enchanted Forrest.
ME: Fuck are you talking about. Your throne looks like u slapped it together with three nails and a hammer
O: Between us, 4 nails and a pair of pliers!
ME: What the hell is wrong with you?
O: [Begins Barking!]
ME: Dear God…this is going to be special!
O: I got two words for that…NI-CE!
The PERSONA
Me: You always like this? I mean since I have been here you have called me 30 different slurs for homosexuals and at least 10 that derogatory to lab monkeys.
O: Ok…for real…no. Honestly, my soul dies each time I insult a mindless butt pirate lab monkey like u!
ME: Damn!
O: Yeah…it is like breathing for me. I once sneezed and crushed this Girl’s hopes and dreams.
ME: By sneezing?
O: Yeah…and I called her a mindless whore who sucks cock to fill the gaping hole her step dad left in her soul and ass.
ME: HAHAHAHA…sorry..that was legitimately funny.
O: I know…but u know what…it is all about the work I put into this. I research. I even got a Master’s degree on accident from all the books I read learning new ways to insult people and make them laugh and then insult them again.
ME: That is commendable. Your kinda like a modern day George Carlin, without the pony tail….wait…are you growing one?
O: Uhhh…no…not at all. [fumbles around looking for clippers] As I was saying…when I am on the streets, where I grew up, I am on. FULLY SWITCHED ON BABY!. BOW DOWN BEFORE YOUR MASTER….
ME: Do you literally have to stand on the table for that?
O: SILENCE YOU FILTHY TROGLODYTE!
Life:
ME: So give me ur views on life?
O: JUST RACK BABY…BANG THE BOX…WORK THE MIDDLE…
ME: So ur motto also doubles for sexual innuendo
O: WORK THE HOLE…
ME: You’re not even trying anymore…hey ur daughter just walked.
O: [in an epic Jekyll-Hydean transformation]…and furthermore, if I could better my fellow man that would be great.
ME: Fuck was that? Ur Girl walked in and u sounded like u actually went to school.
O: Huh? What…I blacked out…I think she neutralizes my power.
ME: You’re a punk ass bitch!
O: Owww…no need to say that…that was mean and inconsiderate….furthermore…
ME:…Holy shit she does. Ur normal now…Bells makes u normal.. “DICK!…your mother!… ur an ugly man!”
O: [breaking into tears] Please…my soul…stop [then horror strikes…Bells leaves the room..she was wearing headphones so no permanent damage] Bitch huh…in front of Bells…Well..is it my fault ur dick finds it way into….
ME: WHOA…I think she is coming back!
O: As I was saying earlier…Life is about racking, working, and banging the box. Write that down.
Politics:
ME: So you’re a REPUBLICAN
O: YES…NO..I am in Independent now. IF I am going to make my money I don’t want the Government in my business! STAY OUT OF MY LIFE UNCLE SAM!!!
ME: Didn’t u apply for all kinds of Fed Aid
O: Yeah, but see that is my tax dollars at work! I Am not mooching off welfare or draining our economy like those immigrants who illegally cross the Border…REPUBLICAN BABY!
Me: dude…your fam came over illegally.
O: Fuck them too…should be deported…calling INS now…Fucking drain on our economy!
ME: Didn’t we have a surplus under Clinton…
O: Oh there u go again, you bleeding heart liberal. Spouting off facts and messages of hope…great!
ME: Why do you have government cheese in ur fridge?
O: NEXT TOPIC! FUCK YOU…FUCK YOU! [Barking commences again]
BLOG IT OUT
ME: You started a Blog with your friends…
O: NO..I AM THE STAR…THE ALPHA…THE SUPREME COMMANDER…
ME: Fuck does that have to do with your blog? I was going to say, you are quite entertaining…where do the topics come from?
O: OVERLOAD OMEGA OF THE MANCOW QUADRANT! Nothing I see is not mine..
ME: Why in Lord’s name are you shouting…
O: Huh? What…who…Damn…I get my topics from the old GRAPE…the MELON!!! They kinda just come out. Again, I do so much research so that I can make fun of people I just pick things up.
ME: Ahhh..so it is just a by product…
O: U need a fucking diagram…yeah…Like when I read something like our Governor getting arrested or the Knicks Losing, first thing, I am going to make fun of Liberal Democrats for being anal whores bent on destroying my way of life. Then I am going to make fun of Johnner for sucking like the Knicks. Somewhere in the middle I am going to remember something I read in class one day, and just blog it out!
ME: Amazing!
O: What, my thought process?
ME: NO, the fact you have 200 Ninja Swords. What are your preparing for?
O: That is how I open my cans of soup. That one there is what I use to change the channel on my TV!
PART TWO OF THE INTERVIEW COMING SOON!
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Glen Davis lives up to nickname...
Okay, so I've been watching lots of basketball and enjoying most of it. I absolutely love watching the Celtics play. However, I haven't been a fan of the sport long enough to know whether it because they actually play like a team or if they're just better than almost everyone else. In any case, I was watching the lopsided win against Portland on friday when they showed Glen "Big Baby" Davis in a full blown tantrum that my 3 year old would be impressed with which can be seen here ---> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=byfIiGFiBdQ&eurl=http://brokencontrollers.com/forums/glen-big-baby-davis-crying-after-kevin-garnett-s-lashing-t564288.php&feature=player_embedded
Now, let's pause the story there and ask ourselves some questions. What could make a man that size cry like a *****? Did the Celtics lose? Hmm...nooo. They're up by 20. Was he given an unfair technical foul and ejected from the game? Nope. He's not even in the game and he's still on the bench. Not that I think any of these are valid reasons for a good cry, but man crying under these circumstances would not warrant further scrutiny.
Back to the story. My friends....Glen Davis was crying and cussing because KG "yelled" at him. Are you ****ing kidding me?!?! Really??? Apparently KG called an impromptu team meeting for the bench players because they pissed away a 20 point lead and Portland was only down by 8 at the time. KG reached out and grabbed Big Baby's arm due to the fact that he was standing 2 feet away looking uninterested. I could make the obvious comparisons but it would be a waste of my time and yours because its obvious. What I will say, however, is that I admire KG the more I see of him. Sure, he could have called Big Baby the beeyah he is, but he didn't. What KG did was to acknowledge Big Baby's frustration with his role and that he would sit down and talk to him. You GOTTA love that! I don't know if I would have had that kinda restraint! What the hell can Glen say to that? He acts an ass and KG keeps it movin and passes on the opportunity to call him on his foolishness. Coaches of young players in any sport should not only show film of their opponents but of KG on and off the court. They should study that cat and learn.
Now, let's pause the story there and ask ourselves some questions. What could make a man that size cry like a *****? Did the Celtics lose? Hmm...nooo. They're up by 20. Was he given an unfair technical foul and ejected from the game? Nope. He's not even in the game and he's still on the bench. Not that I think any of these are valid reasons for a good cry, but man crying under these circumstances would not warrant further scrutiny.
Back to the story. My friends....Glen Davis was crying and cussing because KG "yelled" at him. Are you ****ing kidding me?!?! Really??? Apparently KG called an impromptu team meeting for the bench players because they pissed away a 20 point lead and Portland was only down by 8 at the time. KG reached out and grabbed Big Baby's arm due to the fact that he was standing 2 feet away looking uninterested. I could make the obvious comparisons but it would be a waste of my time and yours because its obvious. What I will say, however, is that I admire KG the more I see of him. Sure, he could have called Big Baby the beeyah he is, but he didn't. What KG did was to acknowledge Big Baby's frustration with his role and that he would sit down and talk to him. You GOTTA love that! I don't know if I would have had that kinda restraint! What the hell can Glen say to that? He acts an ass and KG keeps it movin and passes on the opportunity to call him on his foolishness. Coaches of young players in any sport should not only show film of their opponents but of KG on and off the court. They should study that cat and learn.
Friday, December 5, 2008
Songs of Songs Sake!
These are the songs that I am feeling today. I wanted to highlight them because in this era of top 40s, and DJ spins, we sometimes forget the gold of years past. Small list, and I invite u to add to it.
Stripped by Depeche Mode
Fantastic song, with some pretty deep lyrics. The idea of being ‘naked’ and having to be just u, and think and act on your own is pretty daunting. We all rely on people, but to have to step out and just be u and carry that weight can crush a person or forge them into something bigger…greater.
Let me see u stripped down the bone
Let me hear you
Make decisions
Without your television
Let me hear you speaking
Just for me
Let me see you
Stripped down to the bone
Let me hear you speaking
Just for me
Let me hear u crying just for me
Karma Police by Radiohead
Radiohead was kool when ColdPlay was still trying to figure out what cause to fight against. I am a Coldplay fan, but lets not forget who got us to think first. Songs like Fake Plastic Trees and Creep are just genius, but this one is like an anthem to those of us who want to quietly say, FUCK YOU! And have a nice day. Just quiet rage.
Karma police, I’ve given all I can, its not enough
I’ve given all I can, but were still on the payroll
This is what you get, this is what you get
This is what you get, when you mess with us
And for a minute there, I lost myself, I lost myself
And for a minute there, I lost myself, I lost myself
Bullet the Blue Sky by U2
This part of the song is just cold blooded. The music mellows, and Bono comes at u raw… ONE HUNDRED…TWO HUNDRED! …AND OUTSIDE IS AMERICA…AND OUTSIDE IS AMERICA!!! I am not smart enough to know what the hell he is talking about, but I am in. Chips are pushed into the middle of the table, because I am in!
This guy comes up to me
His face red like a rose on a thorn bush
Like all the colors of a royal flush
And hes peeling off those dollar bills
Slapping them down
One hundred, two hundred
And I can see those fighter planes
And I can see those fighter planes
Across the mud huts where the children sleep
Through the alleys of a quiet city street
Take the staircase to the first floor
Turn the key and slowly unlock the door
As a man breathes into a saxophone
Through the walls we hear the city groan
Outside its america
Outside its america
Everyday is Exactly the Same by NIN
Being stuck in routine is what we fear. The song encompasses today, when that snow bites our skin and we can see our breaths fill the air and wonder why the fuck we are enduring this. The mundane task at work, the crazy person waiting for us at home. Hell, for Cubs fans the failure of 100 years. When u hear it, snap out of it and thank Trent for pointing out this ain’t no way to go out.
I believe I can see the future
Cause I repeat the same routine
I think I used to have a purpose
But then again
That might have been a dream
I think I used to have a voice
Now I never make a sound
I just do what I've been told
I really don't want them to come around
Temptation by New Order
Quite simply the best part of this song is the following lyrics. The thought that what u do and say and think could impact others. This is especially important for me, since I have lil C looking up to me. What is funny is that we forget that others thoughts impact us from above. Some joker fucks up and we all suffer.
Thoughts from above hit the people down below
People in this world we have no place to go
Oh, I've never met anyone quite like you before
Shoplifters of the World by The Smiths
Song reminds me of the FourWinds crew…we were a bit of a thieving bunch back in the day. Nothing crazy, but the song always reminds me of us. The thought of us scrubs uniting and taking over is AWESOME.
Shoplifters of the world,
Unite and take over
Shoplifters of the world Hand it over
A heartless hand on my shoulder A push - and it's over Alabaster crashes down (Six months is a long time) Tried living in the real world Instead of a shell But before I began ... I was bored before I even began
-iz3y!
Stripped by Depeche Mode
Fantastic song, with some pretty deep lyrics. The idea of being ‘naked’ and having to be just u, and think and act on your own is pretty daunting. We all rely on people, but to have to step out and just be u and carry that weight can crush a person or forge them into something bigger…greater.
Let me see u stripped down the bone
Let me hear you
Make decisions
Without your television
Let me hear you speaking
Just for me
Let me see you
Stripped down to the bone
Let me hear you speaking
Just for me
Let me hear u crying just for me
Karma Police by Radiohead
Radiohead was kool when ColdPlay was still trying to figure out what cause to fight against. I am a Coldplay fan, but lets not forget who got us to think first. Songs like Fake Plastic Trees and Creep are just genius, but this one is like an anthem to those of us who want to quietly say, FUCK YOU! And have a nice day. Just quiet rage.
Karma police, I’ve given all I can, its not enough
I’ve given all I can, but were still on the payroll
This is what you get, this is what you get
This is what you get, when you mess with us
And for a minute there, I lost myself, I lost myself
And for a minute there, I lost myself, I lost myself
Bullet the Blue Sky by U2
This part of the song is just cold blooded. The music mellows, and Bono comes at u raw… ONE HUNDRED…TWO HUNDRED! …AND OUTSIDE IS AMERICA…AND OUTSIDE IS AMERICA!!! I am not smart enough to know what the hell he is talking about, but I am in. Chips are pushed into the middle of the table, because I am in!
This guy comes up to me
His face red like a rose on a thorn bush
Like all the colors of a royal flush
And hes peeling off those dollar bills
Slapping them down
One hundred, two hundred
And I can see those fighter planes
And I can see those fighter planes
Across the mud huts where the children sleep
Through the alleys of a quiet city street
Take the staircase to the first floor
Turn the key and slowly unlock the door
As a man breathes into a saxophone
Through the walls we hear the city groan
Outside its america
Outside its america
Everyday is Exactly the Same by NIN
Being stuck in routine is what we fear. The song encompasses today, when that snow bites our skin and we can see our breaths fill the air and wonder why the fuck we are enduring this. The mundane task at work, the crazy person waiting for us at home. Hell, for Cubs fans the failure of 100 years. When u hear it, snap out of it and thank Trent for pointing out this ain’t no way to go out.
I believe I can see the future
Cause I repeat the same routine
I think I used to have a purpose
But then again
That might have been a dream
I think I used to have a voice
Now I never make a sound
I just do what I've been told
I really don't want them to come around
Temptation by New Order
Quite simply the best part of this song is the following lyrics. The thought that what u do and say and think could impact others. This is especially important for me, since I have lil C looking up to me. What is funny is that we forget that others thoughts impact us from above. Some joker fucks up and we all suffer.
Thoughts from above hit the people down below
People in this world we have no place to go
Oh, I've never met anyone quite like you before
Shoplifters of the World by The Smiths
Song reminds me of the FourWinds crew…we were a bit of a thieving bunch back in the day. Nothing crazy, but the song always reminds me of us. The thought of us scrubs uniting and taking over is AWESOME.
Shoplifters of the world,
Unite and take over
Shoplifters of the world Hand it over
A heartless hand on my shoulder A push - and it's over Alabaster crashes down (Six months is a long time) Tried living in the real world Instead of a shell But before I began ... I was bored before I even began
-iz3y!
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Interview: Flying with DJ Yayo
Conducted September 2006
I wrote this after I found out my good friend Yayo was becoming an Air Marshall. Why is this a shocker? Well at the time, he was deathly afraid of flying, and was applying to a job that required constant air time. So read on..and enjoy.
Interview commence.
Raise your hand if you believe Yayo is leaving? Go ahead…raise them high…higher…cause right now…I got nothing.
Fuck it…raise your hand if you know who Yayo is…with the turnover of this team, I am not sure you guys even know who the real Yayo is…so in honor…and this truly is…I will lay it out for you.
“iz3y’s view of yayo!”
Who is Yayo you ask? Yayo is the entrepreneur without the cash or business plan. Yayo is the athlete without the athleticism. Yayo is the metrosexual without the sexual.
Does it surprise me that Yayo wants to be an Air Marshall when he hates to fly…HELL NO…that is Yayo. That is very essence of Yayo. When Steve “2Tights” Martinez says he wants to be an IRS agent and give up about 250K from his currently bloated salary, I say…that fucking guy is crazy. When Yayo says, “I want to be an Air Marshall…I mean they don’t always fly do they?” I say…YES…that is Yayo.
Pure and simple and to the point Yayo.
So a few questions I have for Yayo and I was lucky enough to get an exclusive interview.
On Fear of Flying
Me: “ You don’t like to fly…how will you cope?”
Yayo: “As long as I can drink, I will be. A OK!
ME: “you can’t drink on a flight when you are a Marshall”
Yayo: “oh right [he begins winking at me] I will be drinking Ginger Ale [the winking continues and I am getting uncomfortable]
On Softball
ME:”what about the team? How is that going to be leaving?”
Yayo: “Fuck the team. I have carried the team for so long that I have arthritis in my knees. Who do you think told Steve to wear the tightest pants he could find..ME! that’s who!
You think that was coffee I was drinking…nope..that was a steaming cup of WHOOP ASS I WAS DOWNING. I am tired of carrying you sad sacks of garbage. I want to do something easier like harass people for looking Middle Eastern.
Me: “But your numbers sucked and I regularly outplayed you!”
Yayo:”Please…you think it was easy making you assholes look good. IT wasn’t. I am the greatest of all TIME!!! BTw…remember 3rd base in the playoffs in spring…”
ME: “ Touche….Touche!”
On being a Bartender
ME: “What about your dream of making ‘cocktail’ a reality?”
Yayo: “it pains me…I had that goal…it was a dream, but who says I still won’t be slinging drinks in the air. You think they can handle the YAYO?
Me: “Stop trying to tear your shirt off. Remember you can’t drink in the air…”
Yayo: “Dude…you don’t know. I can do whatever I want…AIR MARSHALL, BITCH!!! As a matter of fact you are looking real suspicious right now…let me get my latex glove”
ME:”Seriously…put down the KY jelly, cause this ain’t happening. Are you gonna miss the late nights and starbucks at 3pm?
Yayo: “No I figure the miscellaneous stewardess ass I will be staring at and hitting in the bathrooms will make up for it!”
Me: “That’s your plan?”
Yayo: “OH YEAH!!!!...I am a FUCKING AIR MARSHALL!”
On leaving Chicago
ME: “What about leaving Chicago, the windy City?”
Yayo: “I will fly over and shed a tear on my way to Idaho or whatever. But I have already made arrangements for my Hairdresser to move to DC with me so no big deal. Nothing else here really matters.”
ME:”What about your condos? Family? The White Sox?
Yayo: “Condos…let them bitches burn for all I care. As for my family…hey they have my number. I know where they live. The White Sox are a whole different matter. That hurts. I signed up for MLB live and hope to follow them on my computer while I fly.
ME: “But you can’t use a computer while you fly”
Yayo: [stunned and in disbelief..anger approaching a boiling poing] “I AM A FUCKING…
ME:” AIR MARSHALL…yeah I got it!
On life
Me: “So what is your philosophy on life…on this whole thing we call LIFE!”
Yayo: “Fuck it…Carpe Diem bitches. You have to live your life to the fullest, one cup of coffee at a time. Yeah you could wait for life to knock on your door and give you a giant cardboard check, but not me.
I go to life’s house pick her up and take her like an Asian Whore working the USO circuit. That is the way I live…so I may be afraid to fly, but I ain’t afraid of staring at some stewardess ass all DAY! Coach …er….Air Marshall out…BITCHES!!!!
And that wraps up our exclusive interview with Yayo…more to come at his going away hangover!!!
I wrote this after I found out my good friend Yayo was becoming an Air Marshall. Why is this a shocker? Well at the time, he was deathly afraid of flying, and was applying to a job that required constant air time. So read on..and enjoy.
Interview commence.
Raise your hand if you believe Yayo is leaving? Go ahead…raise them high…higher…cause right now…I got nothing.
Fuck it…raise your hand if you know who Yayo is…with the turnover of this team, I am not sure you guys even know who the real Yayo is…so in honor…and this truly is…I will lay it out for you.
“iz3y’s view of yayo!”
Who is Yayo you ask? Yayo is the entrepreneur without the cash or business plan. Yayo is the athlete without the athleticism. Yayo is the metrosexual without the sexual.
Does it surprise me that Yayo wants to be an Air Marshall when he hates to fly…HELL NO…that is Yayo. That is very essence of Yayo. When Steve “2Tights” Martinez says he wants to be an IRS agent and give up about 250K from his currently bloated salary, I say…that fucking guy is crazy. When Yayo says, “I want to be an Air Marshall…I mean they don’t always fly do they?” I say…YES…that is Yayo.
Pure and simple and to the point Yayo.
So a few questions I have for Yayo and I was lucky enough to get an exclusive interview.
On Fear of Flying
Me: “ You don’t like to fly…how will you cope?”
Yayo: “As long as I can drink, I will be. A OK!
ME: “you can’t drink on a flight when you are a Marshall”
Yayo: “oh right [he begins winking at me] I will be drinking Ginger Ale [the winking continues and I am getting uncomfortable]
On Softball
ME:”what about the team? How is that going to be leaving?”
Yayo: “Fuck the team. I have carried the team for so long that I have arthritis in my knees. Who do you think told Steve to wear the tightest pants he could find..ME! that’s who!
You think that was coffee I was drinking…nope..that was a steaming cup of WHOOP ASS I WAS DOWNING. I am tired of carrying you sad sacks of garbage. I want to do something easier like harass people for looking Middle Eastern.
Me: “But your numbers sucked and I regularly outplayed you!”
Yayo:”Please…you think it was easy making you assholes look good. IT wasn’t. I am the greatest of all TIME!!! BTw…remember 3rd base in the playoffs in spring…”
ME: “ Touche….Touche!”
On being a Bartender
ME: “What about your dream of making ‘cocktail’ a reality?”
Yayo: “it pains me…I had that goal…it was a dream, but who says I still won’t be slinging drinks in the air. You think they can handle the YAYO?
Me: “Stop trying to tear your shirt off. Remember you can’t drink in the air…”
Yayo: “Dude…you don’t know. I can do whatever I want…AIR MARSHALL, BITCH!!! As a matter of fact you are looking real suspicious right now…let me get my latex glove”
ME:”Seriously…put down the KY jelly, cause this ain’t happening. Are you gonna miss the late nights and starbucks at 3pm?
Yayo: “No I figure the miscellaneous stewardess ass I will be staring at and hitting in the bathrooms will make up for it!”
Me: “That’s your plan?”
Yayo: “OH YEAH!!!!...I am a FUCKING AIR MARSHALL!”
On leaving Chicago
ME: “What about leaving Chicago, the windy City?”
Yayo: “I will fly over and shed a tear on my way to Idaho or whatever. But I have already made arrangements for my Hairdresser to move to DC with me so no big deal. Nothing else here really matters.”
ME:”What about your condos? Family? The White Sox?
Yayo: “Condos…let them bitches burn for all I care. As for my family…hey they have my number. I know where they live. The White Sox are a whole different matter. That hurts. I signed up for MLB live and hope to follow them on my computer while I fly.
ME: “But you can’t use a computer while you fly”
Yayo: [stunned and in disbelief..anger approaching a boiling poing] “I AM A FUCKING…
ME:” AIR MARSHALL…yeah I got it!
On life
Me: “So what is your philosophy on life…on this whole thing we call LIFE!”
Yayo: “Fuck it…Carpe Diem bitches. You have to live your life to the fullest, one cup of coffee at a time. Yeah you could wait for life to knock on your door and give you a giant cardboard check, but not me.
I go to life’s house pick her up and take her like an Asian Whore working the USO circuit. That is the way I live…so I may be afraid to fly, but I ain’t afraid of staring at some stewardess ass all DAY! Coach …er….Air Marshall out…BITCHES!!!!
And that wraps up our exclusive interview with Yayo…more to come at his going away hangover!!!
Monday, December 1, 2008
Interview: Here's Johnny!
Conducted March 2007
This was the first in a series of one, of fake interviews I conducted here at work. I have done other interviews but never at work. Johnny had just left SUA to go Florida and quickly came back when he realized how much that decision sucked. So, we treated him like a new employee and well...just read it!
INTERVIEW!
People ask me..."iz3y, why are you so mean to the new employees at SUA?"
My usual reply is "because i can be!" I mean who are these people that i have to be nice to them? What have they done for me lately? We buy them lunch, we give them cubes stocked with supplies and they want me to be nice. Yeah, i can see why they need my hello...my prompt service. Those poor babies have suffered enough.
Ultimately, though, my responsibility is to the FAM, and if the FAM wants me to be nicer, then fine, I will respect that.
LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, let us extend a warm SUA welcome to our new employee. In the utmost respect for this person, I sat down and interviewed him and even included a few pics so that when you see him in the hallway, you will recognize him and offer a consoling and friendly hello. Let me preface this interview by saying, this man is a true character, and please brace yourselves for this truly unique experience.
SUA NEWEST EMPLOYEE:
Name: Johnner Guadalupe Londono
Dept: IT (QA)
Title: UAT ANALYST / Talent Evaluator / Coffee Boy
Hobbies: Basketball/Soccer/knitting/manicures
Age: 27 (34 actual age)
Height: 5'8" 1/2
Weight: ???
Shoe Size: 14 (11 without extended toe box)
Where are you from?
JGL: "I am from Plano, Texas, but part of my schtick with woman is I tell them I am from Cali, Columbia...I even have the accent to verify this line. Watch....Heeey ladies...jouw want to go dancing or sonthing? It is great...works like a charm!"
me: "Very disturbing...owwww....damn man, I am sure you just kicked me...and you are a good 10 feet awat!"
JGL: "Sorry...point shoes are a hazard that I have had to deal with in order to keep up this facade of a latin player. Wait..is this interview going public...I better use my accent...just in case the ladies are reading!"
me: "why are you fixing your eyebrows and mustache like the guy from Coming to America...no one can see you."
What brings you to SUA?
JGL: " I love IAN...i am enamored with .... I mean.... (JGL slips into his phoney accent) "I feeeel, that i could make all the deeeeference and take theees company to the freeeeaking TOP!"
me: "top of what, and why are still kicking me!"
JGL: "TO THE TOP...This company could have all kinds of freaking HAND!"
me: "what the hell are you talking about? oh...you watch Seindfeld...i get it now. Not very "latin Playerish" now is that. I mean, shouldn't you be quoting telenovelas or making up slang terms like our resident Peruvian Prince?"
JGL: "It's Seinfeld...he is universal....wait...PERUVIAN...oh as long as he isn't a freaking Argentianian...I can STAND freaking Argentinians due to my Columbian roots!"
me: "aren't you from Texas?"
JGL: "yes, but remember the back story is that I am from Cali, Columbia...for the ladies edification"
What is it that you will bring to the Company?
JGL: "Style, latin flavor mostly..."
me: "you realize you're in a IT role right...and why are you dancing?"
JGL: "that's me baby...that is how i freaking do!"
me: "seriously, ur stepping on my toes with those things...also, i think your scorpion chain just hit me in the head.
JGL: "can you feel the music...the congas, the trumpets, the drums...."
me: "what music u psychotic...."
JGL: "YEAH....LIVIN' THE VIDA LOCA!!!! you say something...i wass grooving to my main mang RICKY MARTIN!"
me: "naw...i am good!"
What goals have you set up for yourself? What r u trying to achieve?
JGL: "look...i don't know about all these questions? I am just living in the freaking moment. What happens happens...you hear me ladies!?!?!"
me: "what ladies man...there is no one else around...and damn...is that your cologne?"
JGL: "You like it huh...my own blend of Michael Jordan and Derek Jeters colognes. together they are freaking ridiculous!"
me: "I am sure i am permantly scarred. What is that in your hand?"
JGL: "a couple pictures for the ladies. I need you to post them in this interview...for the ladies!"
me: "u sure?"
JGL: "OF COURSE I AM FREAKING SURE...THIS IS GOLD...THIS IS FREAKING GOLD!!!!"
me: "wow..."
JGL: "i know right...it is too much. Can you handle the rush of woman that is about to come?"
me: "i think i'm good. Wait..what is that rusted out shitbox behind you?"
JGL: "That is the RIDE! Tinted Windows, four doors....wheels. FREAKING GREAT!
me: "wait you have more pics?"
JGL: "of course...hey can you blow these up to poster size? Or would that cause a stampede?"
JGL: "I mean look at me here...this is crazy! I think i should charge you posting these!"
me: "naw dude...i think we're good!"
JGL: "where is my other one? The one with my crew!"
me:" sorry...here we go"
me: "why is that one guy all alone over there?"
JGL: "what guy...I only see the star in the Center. There is only ONE GUY you should be focusing on. Not my damn body double!"
JGL: "Let me ask you something. Are there gonna be any Italians working there. I hate them more than freaking Argentinians. Skinless Alligators!"
me: "what the hell does that mean?"
JGL: [dropping the accent] I am not really sure. I heard it used one day and i thought it was a fabulous line. ohhh...slipped up didn't I? [returning to accent] "Freaking scumbags!"
me: "well i hope you enjoy ur stay here. You will find we are all pretty cool and helpful if you need anything...'
JGL: "lunch!"
me: "what..what you mean?"
JGL:"I need freaking lunch. where can i get chilli, a hamburger, fries, Extra Large Coke, and another hamburger? I have to eat light...watching my figure. I am a freaking atlete!"
me: "WOW!"
JGL: "I know...ever see an indoor rainbow?"
me: "i meant wow...how are u still alive after eating all that? and an indoor rainbow...isn't a rainbow the universal sign for....uh forget it!"
JGL: "YEAH...a rainbow...i am a freaking RAINBOW...and indoor RAINBOW!!!!"
And there you have it...our first welcome to SUA interview. I hope you all enjoyed it, and see that I have made the effort to welcome a new employee to the fold, and to the family.
this is iz3y saying..
This was the first in a series of one, of fake interviews I conducted here at work. I have done other interviews but never at work. Johnny had just left SUA to go Florida and quickly came back when he realized how much that decision sucked. So, we treated him like a new employee and well...just read it!
INTERVIEW!
People ask me..."iz3y, why are you so mean to the new employees at SUA?"
My usual reply is "because i can be!" I mean who are these people that i have to be nice to them? What have they done for me lately? We buy them lunch, we give them cubes stocked with supplies and they want me to be nice. Yeah, i can see why they need my hello...my prompt service. Those poor babies have suffered enough.
Ultimately, though, my responsibility is to the FAM, and if the FAM wants me to be nicer, then fine, I will respect that.
LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, let us extend a warm SUA welcome to our new employee. In the utmost respect for this person, I sat down and interviewed him and even included a few pics so that when you see him in the hallway, you will recognize him and offer a consoling and friendly hello. Let me preface this interview by saying, this man is a true character, and please brace yourselves for this truly unique experience.
SUA NEWEST EMPLOYEE:
Name: Johnner Guadalupe Londono
Dept: IT (QA)
Title: UAT ANALYST / Talent Evaluator / Coffee Boy
Hobbies: Basketball/Soccer/knitting/manicures
Age: 27 (34 actual age)
Height: 5'8" 1/2
Weight: ???
Shoe Size: 14 (11 without extended toe box)
Where are you from?
JGL: "I am from Plano, Texas, but part of my schtick with woman is I tell them I am from Cali, Columbia...I even have the accent to verify this line. Watch....Heeey ladies...jouw want to go dancing or sonthing? It is great...works like a charm!"
me: "Very disturbing...owwww....damn man, I am sure you just kicked me...and you are a good 10 feet awat!"
JGL: "Sorry...point shoes are a hazard that I have had to deal with in order to keep up this facade of a latin player. Wait..is this interview going public...I better use my accent...just in case the ladies are reading!"
me: "why are you fixing your eyebrows and mustache like the guy from Coming to America...no one can see you."
What brings you to SUA?
JGL: " I love IAN...i am enamored with .... I mean.... (JGL slips into his phoney accent) "I feeeel, that i could make all the deeeeference and take theees company to the freeeeaking TOP!"
me: "top of what, and why are still kicking me!"
JGL: "TO THE TOP...This company could have all kinds of freaking HAND!"
me: "what the hell are you talking about? oh...you watch Seindfeld...i get it now. Not very "latin Playerish" now is that. I mean, shouldn't you be quoting telenovelas or making up slang terms like our resident Peruvian Prince?"
JGL: "It's Seinfeld...he is universal....wait...PERUVIAN...oh as long as he isn't a freaking Argentianian...I can STAND freaking Argentinians due to my Columbian roots!"
me: "aren't you from Texas?"
JGL: "yes, but remember the back story is that I am from Cali, Columbia...for the ladies edification"
What is it that you will bring to the Company?
JGL: "Style, latin flavor mostly..."
me: "you realize you're in a IT role right...and why are you dancing?"
JGL: "that's me baby...that is how i freaking do!"
me: "seriously, ur stepping on my toes with those things...also, i think your scorpion chain just hit me in the head.
JGL: "can you feel the music...the congas, the trumpets, the drums...."
me: "what music u psychotic...."
JGL: "YEAH....LIVIN' THE VIDA LOCA!!!! you say something...i wass grooving to my main mang RICKY MARTIN!"
me: "naw...i am good!"
What goals have you set up for yourself? What r u trying to achieve?
JGL: "look...i don't know about all these questions? I am just living in the freaking moment. What happens happens...you hear me ladies!?!?!"
me: "what ladies man...there is no one else around...and damn...is that your cologne?"
JGL: "You like it huh...my own blend of Michael Jordan and Derek Jeters colognes. together they are freaking ridiculous!"
me: "I am sure i am permantly scarred. What is that in your hand?"
JGL: "a couple pictures for the ladies. I need you to post them in this interview...for the ladies!"
me: "u sure?"
JGL: "OF COURSE I AM FREAKING SURE...THIS IS GOLD...THIS IS FREAKING GOLD!!!!"
me: "wow..."
JGL: "i know right...it is too much. Can you handle the rush of woman that is about to come?"
me: "i think i'm good. Wait..what is that rusted out shitbox behind you?"
JGL: "That is the RIDE! Tinted Windows, four doors....wheels. FREAKING GREAT!
me: "wait you have more pics?"
JGL: "of course...hey can you blow these up to poster size? Or would that cause a stampede?"
JGL: "I mean look at me here...this is crazy! I think i should charge you posting these!"
me: "naw dude...i think we're good!"
JGL: "where is my other one? The one with my crew!"
me:" sorry...here we go"
me: "why is that one guy all alone over there?"
JGL: "what guy...I only see the star in the Center. There is only ONE GUY you should be focusing on. Not my damn body double!"
JGL: "Let me ask you something. Are there gonna be any Italians working there. I hate them more than freaking Argentinians. Skinless Alligators!"
me: "what the hell does that mean?"
JGL: [dropping the accent] I am not really sure. I heard it used one day and i thought it was a fabulous line. ohhh...slipped up didn't I? [returning to accent] "Freaking scumbags!"
me: "well i hope you enjoy ur stay here. You will find we are all pretty cool and helpful if you need anything...'
JGL: "lunch!"
me: "what..what you mean?"
JGL:"I need freaking lunch. where can i get chilli, a hamburger, fries, Extra Large Coke, and another hamburger? I have to eat light...watching my figure. I am a freaking atlete!"
me: "WOW!"
JGL: "I know...ever see an indoor rainbow?"
me: "i meant wow...how are u still alive after eating all that? and an indoor rainbow...isn't a rainbow the universal sign for....uh forget it!"
JGL: "YEAH...a rainbow...i am a freaking RAINBOW...and indoor RAINBOW!!!!"
And there you have it...our first welcome to SUA interview. I hope you all enjoyed it, and see that I have made the effort to welcome a new employee to the fold, and to the family.
this is iz3y saying..
JGL: "don't you think i should do the freaking exit...I mean i am the RAINBOW!!!"
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Smile..your earned it... Part V
This vid was provided by Strawberry kiss, AKA, Princess DI, AKA, DJ PhatBeats.
One thing that has to be remembered is that here at FourWinds, we are very concerned about the well being of people and we will highlight those people who go above and beyond to take care of their fellow human.. so watch, enjoy, and raise one up to yourselves....you're good people, and your deserve it
Partner in crime
-iz3y!
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Interview: Meet The Schweez!
Conducted in September 2008
I am back and proud to be able to conduct this next interview. Getting an audience with this guy is as hard as it gets. I traversed various neighborhoods and gin joints just hoping to find an in, and finally my day has come. As I drive to Casa de Schwertz, a few things cross my mind. Specifically, how the hell does a Puerto Rican kid from Bridgeport get a name like Schwertfeger? I had more questions but my thoughts were interrupted when I arrived at the Casa. I was immediately approached by a guy who asked me tons of questions about Stats and other useless shit. Past him was the sprawling bachelor pad and complete with typical velvet couches, oil paintings of tigers and Schwertz himself, and what looked like a half naked woman sneaking out the back door. Who is Shadez? Only one way to find out, so with collar loosened and sitting a room with the smell of a freshly lit Cloves cigarette I began…
THE INTERVIEW OF SHADEZ!
THE INTRO
Me: thanks for letting me hang out man…who the hell was that at the door?
JS: you talking to me? Sorry, the cloves are kicking in, and well you know…HAHAHA
Me: nope…know what? It’s a cigarette man, why are you getting the munchies? And do u know u resemble the hell out of REN from REN And STimpy?
JS: Cigarrette…right…right…(winks) sure. REN..must be a classy guy…HAHAHAH
Me: Yeah…so the guy at the door?
JS: my butler..yeah he got hit on the head and now spews nothing but useless stats. Great for taking out my trash though…HAHAHA
Me: NICE! Why do you always laugh…
JS: I don’t know..HAHAHAHA
LOVE LIFE
ME: so do you have a special lady in your life man? It looks like a bad 70s porn set here…so I am saying no.
JS: come on man…pshshshsh…you know how I do. I just flash the smile, apply the gel, and put the money on the table. All good! …HAHAAH
ME: Can your hair really withstand hurricane type winds and what kind of gel is it?
JS: Oh yeah, without a doubt. I am not sure I can reveal my gel brand, but all I have to say is that a smart guy at NASA hooked me up….HAHAHA
Me: Wow…that is impressive. What the hell is that smell?
JS: My bad…can’t leave the cologne open like that…too much for you to handle. SEX PANTHER…sick stuff right? …HAHAH
Me: mos def…please put it away. Did I see someone run out of here like 2 min ago?
JS: Yep…cleaning lady. …HAHAH
ME: looked old
JS: YOU KNOW I HOW I DO! …HAHAHA
ME: I am not high fiving u!
POLITICS
ME: Obama or McCain?
JS: Huh? Do I look like a political guy? Deron Williams or Chris Paul. Pepsi or Coke (PEPSI btw). These are the real issues. Though Palin looks like a hot librarian. I might get political now.
ME: ur way quieter than I expected…whats up with that?
JS: I gotta keep on the down low…under the radar…you know.
ME: no idea…and please put a cap on the cologne…dear god!
JS: being quiet equals mysterious…dangerous…
ME: lonely?
JS: huh? I was doing my hair…huh?
Me: nothing…so u like Palin?
JS: Who? Oh the hot Librarian…Oh yeah. Might have to text her. See if she’s down!
SPORTS
ME: What are your favorite sports teams?
JS: BEARS, BULLS, CUBS, and CHICAGO SKY OF THE WNBA…GO SKY!!!!
ME: Cubs huh…what the hell happened to you? You’re a Bridgeport native. You grew up in the shadow of Comiskey Park
JS: US CELLULAR
ME: low blow my friend
JS: Well I like the women.
ME: huh?
JS: See at SOX games they actually pay attention, at Wrigley…well they are impaired. Nothing like a little edge!
ME: wow….
ME: How did u start playing softball?
JS: well I just took my love of sports and beer and decided to fuse them together. Normally, I play 16in, cause I like big soft balls, but I decided to go with a little something challenging.
ME: Any other Sports?
JS: BAGS! I am champ…I hustled for money as a kid. I dominated the streets. Some people play dice…I bag it up
ME: I have lost to you many times…the pizza flop technique…how?
JS: Lots of wrist work…LOTS!!!
ME: great…explains the lotions. IS that pina colada Butt Lotion?
JS: why ye…
ME: know what…don’t worry about it.
MUSIC
ME: What type of music do you like?
JS: I am down for whatever. House, Freestyle, House…reggaeton…Freestyle…
ME: nice, ur pretty diverse. It also explains the Fantasy Girl that is in the background but not the Hasselhoff poster…wow!!!
JS: I am half german dick. WE LOVE THE HOFF. I have his collection (a secret panel slides open revealing not a carefully stashed collection of porn but a glorious mountain of HOFF material.)
ME: dear lord…u have locks of his hair..Can I tou…
JS: Don’t even think about getting near that.
ME: you know his greatest contribution is Knight Rider right?
JS: Whoa, pump ur breaks son before I go blitz krieg on ur ass. That man is a national treasure in Germany.
ME: he is American..ur American…
JS: settle down…just listen to this cd and tell me it sux!
ME: (listens and almost vomits) it sux.
JS: [violent words in German]….
ME: relax man..just not my cup of tea
JS: YOU WILL CONFORM!!!!
ME: wow!
“don’t talk about the HOFF!
LIFE
ME: what is ur philosophy of on life man
JS: keep it quiet, and attack like a panther when the mood is right. You think this tiger printed robe is an accident. You think these silk sheets with cheetah spots are accidents. You think I get all faded up for nothing. Naw man..premeditated baby…premeditated. Ready for action…adventure…[phone rings] ‘Yeah mom, I will be by to pick up my laundry.’ Gotta jet…girl be calling.
ME: Dude that was ur mom!
JS: yeah..but no one knows that…not like ur going to publish this…HAIL THE HOFF, I AM OUT!!!
I am back and proud to be able to conduct this next interview. Getting an audience with this guy is as hard as it gets. I traversed various neighborhoods and gin joints just hoping to find an in, and finally my day has come. As I drive to Casa de Schwertz, a few things cross my mind. Specifically, how the hell does a Puerto Rican kid from Bridgeport get a name like Schwertfeger? I had more questions but my thoughts were interrupted when I arrived at the Casa. I was immediately approached by a guy who asked me tons of questions about Stats and other useless shit. Past him was the sprawling bachelor pad and complete with typical velvet couches, oil paintings of tigers and Schwertz himself, and what looked like a half naked woman sneaking out the back door. Who is Shadez? Only one way to find out, so with collar loosened and sitting a room with the smell of a freshly lit Cloves cigarette I began…
THE INTERVIEW OF SHADEZ!
THE INTRO
Me: thanks for letting me hang out man…who the hell was that at the door?
JS: you talking to me? Sorry, the cloves are kicking in, and well you know…HAHAHA
Me: nope…know what? It’s a cigarette man, why are you getting the munchies? And do u know u resemble the hell out of REN from REN And STimpy?
JS: Cigarrette…right…right…(winks) sure. REN..must be a classy guy…HAHAHAH
Me: Yeah…so the guy at the door?
JS: my butler..yeah he got hit on the head and now spews nothing but useless stats. Great for taking out my trash though…HAHAHA
Me: NICE! Why do you always laugh…
JS: I don’t know..HAHAHAHA
LOVE LIFE
ME: so do you have a special lady in your life man? It looks like a bad 70s porn set here…so I am saying no.
JS: come on man…pshshshsh…you know how I do. I just flash the smile, apply the gel, and put the money on the table. All good! …HAHAAH
ME: Can your hair really withstand hurricane type winds and what kind of gel is it?
JS: Oh yeah, without a doubt. I am not sure I can reveal my gel brand, but all I have to say is that a smart guy at NASA hooked me up….HAHAHA
Me: Wow…that is impressive. What the hell is that smell?
JS: My bad…can’t leave the cologne open like that…too much for you to handle. SEX PANTHER…sick stuff right? …HAHAH
Me: mos def…please put it away. Did I see someone run out of here like 2 min ago?
JS: Yep…cleaning lady. …HAHAH
ME: looked old
JS: YOU KNOW I HOW I DO! …HAHAHA
ME: I am not high fiving u!
POLITICS
ME: Obama or McCain?
JS: Huh? Do I look like a political guy? Deron Williams or Chris Paul. Pepsi or Coke (PEPSI btw). These are the real issues. Though Palin looks like a hot librarian. I might get political now.
ME: ur way quieter than I expected…whats up with that?
JS: I gotta keep on the down low…under the radar…you know.
ME: no idea…and please put a cap on the cologne…dear god!
JS: being quiet equals mysterious…dangerous…
ME: lonely?
JS: huh? I was doing my hair…huh?
Me: nothing…so u like Palin?
JS: Who? Oh the hot Librarian…Oh yeah. Might have to text her. See if she’s down!
SPORTS
ME: What are your favorite sports teams?
JS: BEARS, BULLS, CUBS, and CHICAGO SKY OF THE WNBA…GO SKY!!!!
ME: Cubs huh…what the hell happened to you? You’re a Bridgeport native. You grew up in the shadow of Comiskey Park
JS: US CELLULAR
ME: low blow my friend
JS: Well I like the women.
ME: huh?
JS: See at SOX games they actually pay attention, at Wrigley…well they are impaired. Nothing like a little edge!
ME: wow….
ME: How did u start playing softball?
JS: well I just took my love of sports and beer and decided to fuse them together. Normally, I play 16in, cause I like big soft balls, but I decided to go with a little something challenging.
ME: Any other Sports?
JS: BAGS! I am champ…I hustled for money as a kid. I dominated the streets. Some people play dice…I bag it up
ME: I have lost to you many times…the pizza flop technique…how?
JS: Lots of wrist work…LOTS!!!
ME: great…explains the lotions. IS that pina colada Butt Lotion?
JS: why ye…
ME: know what…don’t worry about it.
MUSIC
ME: What type of music do you like?
JS: I am down for whatever. House, Freestyle, House…reggaeton…Freestyle…
ME: nice, ur pretty diverse. It also explains the Fantasy Girl that is in the background but not the Hasselhoff poster…wow!!!
JS: I am half german dick. WE LOVE THE HOFF. I have his collection (a secret panel slides open revealing not a carefully stashed collection of porn but a glorious mountain of HOFF material.)
ME: dear lord…u have locks of his hair..Can I tou…
JS: Don’t even think about getting near that.
ME: you know his greatest contribution is Knight Rider right?
JS: Whoa, pump ur breaks son before I go blitz krieg on ur ass. That man is a national treasure in Germany.
ME: he is American..ur American…
JS: settle down…just listen to this cd and tell me it sux!
ME: (listens and almost vomits) it sux.
JS: [violent words in German]….
ME: relax man..just not my cup of tea
JS: YOU WILL CONFORM!!!!
ME: wow!
“don’t talk about the HOFF!
LIFE
ME: what is ur philosophy of on life man
JS: keep it quiet, and attack like a panther when the mood is right. You think this tiger printed robe is an accident. You think these silk sheets with cheetah spots are accidents. You think I get all faded up for nothing. Naw man..premeditated baby…premeditated. Ready for action…adventure…[phone rings] ‘Yeah mom, I will be by to pick up my laundry.’ Gotta jet…girl be calling.
ME: Dude that was ur mom!
JS: yeah..but no one knows that…not like ur going to publish this…HAIL THE HOFF, I AM OUT!!!
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
the HATERZ Ball ...VOL I
1. I hate that Sarah Palin no longer will be on TV...she was hot and dumb!
2. Hate that the Bears have no coordinators, or head coach that have any damn sense.
3. Hate that Ben Gordon and Luol Deng dont realize that Derrick Rose is their boss.
4. Hate that I dont have a grill, not for my teeth, but to burn up some steaks
5. Hate that Omar laughed at his blog, and had it framed above his bar...
6. Hate that my sister is in Italy and is homesick.
7. Hate that the weather gets stupid cold
8. Hate that I wont leave it, never...ever ever!
9. Hate that i havent won the lottery...might have to change my investment strategy
10. Hate the haterz that hate!
2. Hate that the Bears have no coordinators, or head coach that have any damn sense.
3. Hate that Ben Gordon and Luol Deng dont realize that Derrick Rose is their boss.
4. Hate that I dont have a grill, not for my teeth, but to burn up some steaks
5. Hate that Omar laughed at his blog, and had it framed above his bar...
6. Hate that my sister is in Italy and is homesick.
7. Hate that the weather gets stupid cold
8. Hate that I wont leave it, never...ever ever!
9. Hate that i havent won the lottery...might have to change my investment strategy
10. Hate the haterz that hate!
Smile..your earned it... Part IV
Sorry, i know it has been a long time since I have given you all something for being so great. Well here you go, a spoof that is well done, scripted and acted. We watched this repeatedly and used the lines over and over again, just for giggles. Were we slightly inebriated? Yeah, u can say that. Anyway, raise a glass to yourselves, because ur good people, and u deserve it.
ur friend in crime
-iz3y!
Friday, November 14, 2008
Omar's TOP ten moments/lines
1. Birth of his daughter - we got a call whilst camping. I hear he immediately passed out, then woke, and passed out again.
2. "Chara chara Yubera Yubera" - he actually got us yelling this out loud whilst camping. We camped a lot and there is nothing wrong or gay about that.
3. THE ELBOW SMASH DANCE - we were at Betty's Blue Star and Omar walks in half -buzzed/ Half-Crazed dressed in Black and ready to rock. So there is a beat on and he goes nuts and starts announcing, " I am going to dance like this" [proceeds to dance] "then go BAM!!!" [proceeds to mimic his elbow quickly risingup and smashing someone in the face] "and that guys is going to be all like...'MY NOSE MY NOSE!"
Omar did this to every song, all night. Just over and over doing his new dance. I hear it caught on in Germany...Schwartz...can you confirm?
4. "THAT's MY FANTASY TIGHT END!" oh yeah, he yells this out right after Greg Olsen makes a catch and we all just fall out. I mean rolling, Def Comdey Jam laughter style. It is hard to make fun of Omar because he is like a machine gun with words and has psychopath's sense of remorse. Here, he just fell on his sword...or did he swallow one?...GAY ASS!!!
5. The SEE THRU Swim Trunks - if there was a day that tested our friendship more, i dont recall. we all gathered at my parent's house since they were in Cancun and they had a pool. guys and the respective women, are having a good time when we turn on the pool lights and low and behold, Omar's NEOn green trunks have become see thru. People fled that pool faster than the scene in Caddyshack. The mere memory causes me to shake.
6. "PRRRRREEeeeeeEEEECARIOUS!" - you will here this come out of nowhere from Omar. I mean it will just hit u like a ton of bricks and punctuate whatever is going on. Major decision u have to make on the spot...PRECARIOUS!!! Should i eat a slice of sausage or pepperoni pizza...PREEECARIOUS!!!! you will instantly feel the spotlight on you.
7. OMAR drinks Tequila - EVERY TIME...i mean EVERYTIME, he drinks tequila he clutches his chest like Fred Sanford and says "ROUGH!!!" I swear we think he is having a heart attack every time.
8. "...my mother thinks u suck too!" - simple and classic Omar. your locking horns with this man and you run out of material. So you go simple...YO MOMMA! He comes back with 'my mother thinks u suck too". Stunned...like a deer in headlights. I know, as your reading this, your saying, you would have come back with something super smooth...but u have no idea, cause after this the machine gun starts up again.
9. Omar fixes his car with a pair of pliers - so Omar has been driving this Nissan Sentra for years...it fits him like a Modern Fit shirt fits Johnner. One day it breaks down, and the next it is running fine. We ask O, what happened, and he is like, "I just fixed it and all I had was as pair of pliers.!" We were like...right...this man cant hang a picture, but he can tackle Japanese engineering with a pair of pliers. So we ask his dad...this man truly fell out. FELL OUT LAUGHING...Mij and I, just walked away...it was painful to watch...I can still hear him laughing.
10. "I got two words for you..NI-CE!" this is all about delivery with this guy. Your walking along, and say.."damn, 2 cheeseburgers for 1" OMAR: "I got two words for you...NI-CE!"
Instantly, your the Warren Buffet of the fast food world! try it...let someone say something positive and break this out all over them.
So there you go, the top ten moments/lines of my good friend, Jokey, the handsome righthander, sir lucious leftfoot, Fomar, actor, comedian, renaissance painter...Omar.
come back for another installment featuring another of the crew.
-iz3y!
2. "Chara chara Yubera Yubera" - he actually got us yelling this out loud whilst camping. We camped a lot and there is nothing wrong or gay about that.
3. THE ELBOW SMASH DANCE - we were at Betty's Blue Star and Omar walks in half -buzzed/ Half-Crazed dressed in Black and ready to rock. So there is a beat on and he goes nuts and starts announcing, " I am going to dance like this" [proceeds to dance] "then go BAM!!!" [proceeds to mimic his elbow quickly risingup and smashing someone in the face] "and that guys is going to be all like...'MY NOSE MY NOSE!"
Omar did this to every song, all night. Just over and over doing his new dance. I hear it caught on in Germany...Schwartz...can you confirm?
4. "THAT's MY FANTASY TIGHT END!" oh yeah, he yells this out right after Greg Olsen makes a catch and we all just fall out. I mean rolling, Def Comdey Jam laughter style. It is hard to make fun of Omar because he is like a machine gun with words and has psychopath's sense of remorse. Here, he just fell on his sword...or did he swallow one?...GAY ASS!!!
5. The SEE THRU Swim Trunks - if there was a day that tested our friendship more, i dont recall. we all gathered at my parent's house since they were in Cancun and they had a pool. guys and the respective women, are having a good time when we turn on the pool lights and low and behold, Omar's NEOn green trunks have become see thru. People fled that pool faster than the scene in Caddyshack. The mere memory causes me to shake.
6. "PRRRRREEeeeeeEEEECARIOUS!" - you will here this come out of nowhere from Omar. I mean it will just hit u like a ton of bricks and punctuate whatever is going on. Major decision u have to make on the spot...PRECARIOUS!!! Should i eat a slice of sausage or pepperoni pizza...PREEECARIOUS!!!! you will instantly feel the spotlight on you.
7. OMAR drinks Tequila - EVERY TIME...i mean EVERYTIME, he drinks tequila he clutches his chest like Fred Sanford and says "ROUGH!!!" I swear we think he is having a heart attack every time.
8. "...my mother thinks u suck too!" - simple and classic Omar. your locking horns with this man and you run out of material. So you go simple...YO MOMMA! He comes back with 'my mother thinks u suck too". Stunned...like a deer in headlights. I know, as your reading this, your saying, you would have come back with something super smooth...but u have no idea, cause after this the machine gun starts up again.
9. Omar fixes his car with a pair of pliers - so Omar has been driving this Nissan Sentra for years...it fits him like a Modern Fit shirt fits Johnner. One day it breaks down, and the next it is running fine. We ask O, what happened, and he is like, "I just fixed it and all I had was as pair of pliers.!" We were like...right...this man cant hang a picture, but he can tackle Japanese engineering with a pair of pliers. So we ask his dad...this man truly fell out. FELL OUT LAUGHING...Mij and I, just walked away...it was painful to watch...I can still hear him laughing.
10. "I got two words for you..NI-CE!" this is all about delivery with this guy. Your walking along, and say.."damn, 2 cheeseburgers for 1" OMAR: "I got two words for you...NI-CE!"
Instantly, your the Warren Buffet of the fast food world! try it...let someone say something positive and break this out all over them.
So there you go, the top ten moments/lines of my good friend, Jokey, the handsome righthander, sir lucious leftfoot, Fomar, actor, comedian, renaissance painter...Omar.
come back for another installment featuring another of the crew.
-iz3y!
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Rants Vol II
I. So are all rappers going to use electronic filters now? I mean, do they think it is new? This is kind of like when the hip hop community people made fun of Techno, then Timbaland went and heard a beat in a club one time and now people think he is a pioneer. Hey, Kanye, Tpain, and lil weezy the fireman...if u cant sing or rap...shut the fuck up and let mos def get back on the trax. I am sure T.I. would be more than happy to take ur spot. If i wanted to hear a speak n spell rap i would be furiously typing on one right now and collecting millions as i did!
II. Why did the WIRE get cancelled? Why is the Shield the next one out the door? Was it too real? Does the American Public hate great acting and great scripts? I was forced to watch the Sopranos for 7 seasons and that wasn't remotely true or half as entertaining as people made it out to be. It was as bloated as James Gandolfini with stereotypes and cliches. Now don't get me started on PARIS HILTON AND MY SEARCH FOR 15 MINUTES OF MORE FAME. Bring back the shows that actually feature acting, and a plot, and glimpses of genius. Marlo, Omar, Stringer, Vic, Lem, and AVON...RIP. Dexter, Californication, Entourage, Sons of Anarchy, and Rescue me...keep ur head on a swivel.
III. Barack Obama, I salute you. Having a leader u can be proud of is a refreshing idea. Also, anyone who says they listened to his speech and wasn't proud to be an American is full of shit. I am being dead serious about that. U could be a Tax cutting Republican or a bleeding heart liberal Democrat and still see the wisdom, genius, and pride in his statements. Plus, he reps the SOUTHSIDE...BITCHES!!!
IV. Why don't radio stations play Classics? not Classical music, but like old school beats. People still love them, and I bet would listen just to see if they would catch a song that will automatically transport them back to their younger fun days. Is this really that hard to understand? Is it better to like the songs on the radio or hear LOVE LOCKDOWN one more time?
V. I have no issue with Love Lockdown, but it really isnt that great a song. 'Jesus Walks'...stunning. 'Get 'em High'..fantastic. 'Workout Plan'...ass shaking quality. 'Love Lockdown', has its quality, but if u really dig into it, the Speak n SPell sound says very 'stalker on the phone trying to hide his voice as he is hiding in the bushes watching u with binoculars' -esque. And you can't dance to it...u just can't! I tried, and i ended up doing some form of the Harlem Shuffle mixed with Elaine's dance from Seinfeld. I almost pulled a muscle...
VI. Now that the election is over and the ads have died down, will people even care as much as they did a week ago? Why do we need TV to stir us up? Why, cause we dont really care. Honestly, people live their lives and are very grateful for what they got. This is a great country, but when we see on TV that the terrorists are coming, or that we are going to pay higher taxes we get all excitable. WE jump up, rock the pins featuring the cool slogans. We all act like we got Poli Sci Degrees (which are totally useless to begin with) and huff and puff about how the country should be really run. Then right after, shit dies down and we go back to our lives, call up the neighbor we called a 'facist right wing psycho' and invite them over for coffee. Why is that...well that leads me to...
VII. ...Are we ready to admit we are all brainwashed? Not talking about just TV or radio, but the internet as well. The bigger the Ad the more it has to be right. The more they play the ominous music, or the catchy tune, the better it has a chance to stick. If i asked you right now to hum, the Empire Carpet number, i bet all of us in Chicago would know it. YES WE CAN! IT IS TIME FOR CHANGE.
I am not saying we should stop watching TV, just please stop acting like experts because we saw it on TV, Internet or heard it on the radio. If we have no intention of truly examining a point from both sides, then shut the fuck up and enjoy ur life. It is way too short to spend it acting like you work for MSNBC at the local Starbucks.
VIII. Remember all those movies u loved in the 80s? Karate Kid, The Last Dragon (Featuring the two coolest characters ever: Bruce Leroy/Shonuff), Weird Science, and Gremlins, just to name a few. What happened to that child like suspense of disbelief when we go to the movie theaters? Imagine me watching a flick today about the GLO, or a scrawny kid taking on a bunch of punks dressed as Skeletons. I think we have become too cynical to just enjoy the shows.
Then again, maybe we just stepped up our standards!
IX. Men and women have been battling since day one. There have been wars waged, Art created, and books written documenting, detailing, encouraging and advising us through the whole affair. This even after we figured out that our thingy goes into your whatchamacallit. Seriously, why is there a problem? Dont we both want the same thing? Thingy + whatchamacallit = good times. GAmes + fighting = bad times. This shit is not that hard. Damn it I did it again...thought logically. Now a woman is going to tell me about feelings and soulfullness... :D joking...dont get ur panties in a bunch!
X. I am watching mad TV late night, shut up all of you saying what else is new, and I was truly wondering how was I not getting infinitely smarter? I mean look at it this way...I just picked up crazy knowledge. I learned how to move wet off the step and what mistakes to avoid so I don't caught. How does this not improve my intellect? I also know the Miracle Blade never goes dull, in the 50s married couples slept in separate beds, white guys could be racist as long as they were funny and were named Carol, and if you lose all integrity they will give u a show on MTV or VH1 guaranteed. Dude, do not play Trivial Pursuit with me...you will catch an ass whipping and i know how not to get caught by the cops!
"HARDER, FASTER, BETTER, STRONGER"
-Daft Punk (yes, they used an electronic filter and they had the song b4 Kanye got a hold of it)
- theKING
II. Why did the WIRE get cancelled? Why is the Shield the next one out the door? Was it too real? Does the American Public hate great acting and great scripts? I was forced to watch the Sopranos for 7 seasons and that wasn't remotely true or half as entertaining as people made it out to be. It was as bloated as James Gandolfini with stereotypes and cliches. Now don't get me started on PARIS HILTON AND MY SEARCH FOR 15 MINUTES OF MORE FAME. Bring back the shows that actually feature acting, and a plot, and glimpses of genius. Marlo, Omar, Stringer, Vic, Lem, and AVON...RIP. Dexter, Californication, Entourage, Sons of Anarchy, and Rescue me...keep ur head on a swivel.
III. Barack Obama, I salute you. Having a leader u can be proud of is a refreshing idea. Also, anyone who says they listened to his speech and wasn't proud to be an American is full of shit. I am being dead serious about that. U could be a Tax cutting Republican or a bleeding heart liberal Democrat and still see the wisdom, genius, and pride in his statements. Plus, he reps the SOUTHSIDE...BITCHES!!!
IV. Why don't radio stations play Classics? not Classical music, but like old school beats. People still love them, and I bet would listen just to see if they would catch a song that will automatically transport them back to their younger fun days. Is this really that hard to understand? Is it better to like the songs on the radio or hear LOVE LOCKDOWN one more time?
V. I have no issue with Love Lockdown, but it really isnt that great a song. 'Jesus Walks'...stunning. 'Get 'em High'..fantastic. 'Workout Plan'...ass shaking quality. 'Love Lockdown', has its quality, but if u really dig into it, the Speak n SPell sound says very 'stalker on the phone trying to hide his voice as he is hiding in the bushes watching u with binoculars' -esque. And you can't dance to it...u just can't! I tried, and i ended up doing some form of the Harlem Shuffle mixed with Elaine's dance from Seinfeld. I almost pulled a muscle...
VI. Now that the election is over and the ads have died down, will people even care as much as they did a week ago? Why do we need TV to stir us up? Why, cause we dont really care. Honestly, people live their lives and are very grateful for what they got. This is a great country, but when we see on TV that the terrorists are coming, or that we are going to pay higher taxes we get all excitable. WE jump up, rock the pins featuring the cool slogans. We all act like we got Poli Sci Degrees (which are totally useless to begin with) and huff and puff about how the country should be really run. Then right after, shit dies down and we go back to our lives, call up the neighbor we called a 'facist right wing psycho' and invite them over for coffee. Why is that...well that leads me to...
VII. ...Are we ready to admit we are all brainwashed? Not talking about just TV or radio, but the internet as well. The bigger the Ad the more it has to be right. The more they play the ominous music, or the catchy tune, the better it has a chance to stick. If i asked you right now to hum, the Empire Carpet number, i bet all of us in Chicago would know it. YES WE CAN! IT IS TIME FOR CHANGE.
I am not saying we should stop watching TV, just please stop acting like experts because we saw it on TV, Internet or heard it on the radio. If we have no intention of truly examining a point from both sides, then shut the fuck up and enjoy ur life. It is way too short to spend it acting like you work for MSNBC at the local Starbucks.
VIII. Remember all those movies u loved in the 80s? Karate Kid, The Last Dragon (Featuring the two coolest characters ever: Bruce Leroy/Shonuff), Weird Science, and Gremlins, just to name a few. What happened to that child like suspense of disbelief when we go to the movie theaters? Imagine me watching a flick today about the GLO, or a scrawny kid taking on a bunch of punks dressed as Skeletons. I think we have become too cynical to just enjoy the shows.
Then again, maybe we just stepped up our standards!
IX. Men and women have been battling since day one. There have been wars waged, Art created, and books written documenting, detailing, encouraging and advising us through the whole affair. This even after we figured out that our thingy goes into your whatchamacallit. Seriously, why is there a problem? Dont we both want the same thing? Thingy + whatchamacallit = good times. GAmes + fighting = bad times. This shit is not that hard. Damn it I did it again...thought logically. Now a woman is going to tell me about feelings and soulfullness... :D joking...dont get ur panties in a bunch!
X. I am watching mad TV late night, shut up all of you saying what else is new, and I was truly wondering how was I not getting infinitely smarter? I mean look at it this way...I just picked up crazy knowledge. I learned how to move wet off the step and what mistakes to avoid so I don't caught. How does this not improve my intellect? I also know the Miracle Blade never goes dull, in the 50s married couples slept in separate beds, white guys could be racist as long as they were funny and were named Carol, and if you lose all integrity they will give u a show on MTV or VH1 guaranteed. Dude, do not play Trivial Pursuit with me...you will catch an ass whipping and i know how not to get caught by the cops!
"HARDER, FASTER, BETTER, STRONGER"
-Daft Punk (yes, they used an electronic filter and they had the song b4 Kanye got a hold of it)
- theKING
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Super Powers I want to have
in no particular order:
- mind control
- illusions
- super speed
- super strength
- invisiblity
- stop time
How would u guys get down and why?
yeah...being this bored sometimes is a crime!!!
-iz3y!
- mind control
- illusions
- super speed
- super strength
- invisiblity
- stop time
How would u guys get down and why?
yeah...being this bored sometimes is a crime!!!
-iz3y!
Monday, November 3, 2008
Hallowfest Shout out - by T.G.ED
Halloween Bash!!!!!!
Share
Yesterday at 10:09am
As most of you know friday was the halloween party and I just wanted to say, MASSIVE SUCCESS!!!!I owe it all to my friends, you guys did not disappoint, your costumes, your attitudes, I think we proved without a doubt what former art students are capable of.
Some highlights of the night
Voda's dick in the box costume - watching Voda constantly smack Alonzo in the face with the "Package" was probably one of the funnier things I have seen, Watching him walk through the house "accidently" running into People only compounded on the humor, But what really set it off was watching him use the Box as a disposal unit, He truly put his "junk" in the Box. What will you do next Voda!!!
James the hipster - As many of you know James refused to tell me his costume, of course this drove me mad with curiosity and mulled over the idea of waterboarding Phil for the information. So you can imagine I was excited when the day arrived for me to finally see what my friend's mind could possible fashion, Enter James the hipster. As some of you know, James harbors an intense somewhat irrational hatred of “Hipsters” (for full view of said hatred please read “I hate Hipsters”) So to see James come in with his tight pants, Belt that functioned more as an accessory then its primary job of pants holding, tight T-shirt and colored hat, I couldn’t help but Crack up. But I think what truly had me going was when he asked me to get him some beer in his pickle jar. Excellent Job James !!!
Saroni and Claudio – I have to give a shout out to Saroni, a newly acquired member thanks to one Justin “el fucking” Voda for not only coming to her first Lopez “FAM” party but also bringing along one of our (Alonzo and myself) High school classmates. Saroni, amazing call on bringing by one of the first people I met in high school. Claudio lets just say when I walked into the room to see you dress as a female there was NO surprise in my mind. Thanks both of you for coming, you both helped make it a great night!
Where’s Phil??? – Phil I’m not sure if the fact that you slept face to face with another man is hilarious enough, or if it’s the fact that you came in the party with a mid drift version of “Where’s Waldo” Shirt. Oh wait perhaps it’s the fact that you had matching underpants to go along with it. You never cease to amaze me Phil…..
Erin, new member of the PCD – Erin just had to mention, great work on the costume , Loved the fact that you knew the entire dance to “When I grow up”. Also glad you brought a friend and hope she also had a good time. Erin how you can dive down carpeted steps in a PCD outfit with a straight face is an amazement to me.
James, Neal , Phil cutting the rug – Honestly while having music blaring in the background was fun I did not expect there to be much dancing in my tiny little house, But I guess I should have expected that nothing could stop the RB crew, You guys really got the partying going!!
THE PEOPLE WHO MADE THE PARTY POSSIBLE
Ish patient of the rush hospital(what the fuck you injure this time??) – My brother Helped to organize the Party, considering the only thing he had to work with was “Ish I want a Halloween Party” I’d say he did a great Job . As some know my brother is VERY accident prone and the fact that he stole a patients gown from Rush hospital during his most recent visit was funny enough , but if anyone noticed my brother had his recently acquired injury to his eye. I’ve seen people use make up for there Halloween Costumes but to actually use a real injury FOR Halloween. Genius!!
Ani the bee – Thanks older sister and eldest of the Lopez Clan for helping to decorate the party, I love how my older sister knows full well that I’m to lazy to even buy lights for a party I myself asked for. Those ended up being great for setting up the mood once James drunkenly shut the lights off.
Alonzo the young Hugh Hefner – Alonzo came in rocking the velvet Robe and playboy bunny (his gf Lynn) in hand. I owe a HUGE thanks to my amazing roommate for helping set up the house and more importantly, bringing the Keg. I recently bashed my ankle pretty decent (tripped over first base) and without Alonzo we wouldn’t have had a Keg or 160 jello shots. If anyone got drunk at the Halloween bash you owe it all to this man.
Rolli the scarecrow – I had a DJ set up for the party but he cancelled last minute and The Halloween Bash was on the verge of extinction. Rolli I saved you for last because you definitely saved the party by providing both the speakers and SICK BEATS thanks man I owe you one.
If anyone has more to share please feel free to throw some comments down PEACE!!!! T.G.ED the green man
P.S. some people who were missed Sam Lopez, Meghan Coleman, Brittany Caldwell, Claire ParkinsonSorry you guys couldn’t make the party, you were definitely missed and I really hope you can make it out for the next one.
Share
Yesterday at 10:09am
As most of you know friday was the halloween party and I just wanted to say, MASSIVE SUCCESS!!!!I owe it all to my friends, you guys did not disappoint, your costumes, your attitudes, I think we proved without a doubt what former art students are capable of.
Some highlights of the night
Voda's dick in the box costume - watching Voda constantly smack Alonzo in the face with the "Package" was probably one of the funnier things I have seen, Watching him walk through the house "accidently" running into People only compounded on the humor, But what really set it off was watching him use the Box as a disposal unit, He truly put his "junk" in the Box. What will you do next Voda!!!
James the hipster - As many of you know James refused to tell me his costume, of course this drove me mad with curiosity and mulled over the idea of waterboarding Phil for the information. So you can imagine I was excited when the day arrived for me to finally see what my friend's mind could possible fashion, Enter James the hipster. As some of you know, James harbors an intense somewhat irrational hatred of “Hipsters” (for full view of said hatred please read “I hate Hipsters”) So to see James come in with his tight pants, Belt that functioned more as an accessory then its primary job of pants holding, tight T-shirt and colored hat, I couldn’t help but Crack up. But I think what truly had me going was when he asked me to get him some beer in his pickle jar. Excellent Job James !!!
Saroni and Claudio – I have to give a shout out to Saroni, a newly acquired member thanks to one Justin “el fucking” Voda for not only coming to her first Lopez “FAM” party but also bringing along one of our (Alonzo and myself) High school classmates. Saroni, amazing call on bringing by one of the first people I met in high school. Claudio lets just say when I walked into the room to see you dress as a female there was NO surprise in my mind. Thanks both of you for coming, you both helped make it a great night!
Where’s Phil??? – Phil I’m not sure if the fact that you slept face to face with another man is hilarious enough, or if it’s the fact that you came in the party with a mid drift version of “Where’s Waldo” Shirt. Oh wait perhaps it’s the fact that you had matching underpants to go along with it. You never cease to amaze me Phil…..
Erin, new member of the PCD – Erin just had to mention, great work on the costume , Loved the fact that you knew the entire dance to “When I grow up”. Also glad you brought a friend and hope she also had a good time. Erin how you can dive down carpeted steps in a PCD outfit with a straight face is an amazement to me.
James, Neal , Phil cutting the rug – Honestly while having music blaring in the background was fun I did not expect there to be much dancing in my tiny little house, But I guess I should have expected that nothing could stop the RB crew, You guys really got the partying going!!
THE PEOPLE WHO MADE THE PARTY POSSIBLE
Ish patient of the rush hospital(what the fuck you injure this time??) – My brother Helped to organize the Party, considering the only thing he had to work with was “Ish I want a Halloween Party” I’d say he did a great Job . As some know my brother is VERY accident prone and the fact that he stole a patients gown from Rush hospital during his most recent visit was funny enough , but if anyone noticed my brother had his recently acquired injury to his eye. I’ve seen people use make up for there Halloween Costumes but to actually use a real injury FOR Halloween. Genius!!
Ani the bee – Thanks older sister and eldest of the Lopez Clan for helping to decorate the party, I love how my older sister knows full well that I’m to lazy to even buy lights for a party I myself asked for. Those ended up being great for setting up the mood once James drunkenly shut the lights off.
Alonzo the young Hugh Hefner – Alonzo came in rocking the velvet Robe and playboy bunny (his gf Lynn) in hand. I owe a HUGE thanks to my amazing roommate for helping set up the house and more importantly, bringing the Keg. I recently bashed my ankle pretty decent (tripped over first base) and without Alonzo we wouldn’t have had a Keg or 160 jello shots. If anyone got drunk at the Halloween bash you owe it all to this man.
Rolli the scarecrow – I had a DJ set up for the party but he cancelled last minute and The Halloween Bash was on the verge of extinction. Rolli I saved you for last because you definitely saved the party by providing both the speakers and SICK BEATS thanks man I owe you one.
If anyone has more to share please feel free to throw some comments down PEACE!!!! T.G.ED the green man
P.S. some people who were missed Sam Lopez, Meghan Coleman, Brittany Caldwell, Claire ParkinsonSorry you guys couldn’t make the party, you were definitely missed and I really hope you can make it out for the next one.
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