Shout OUT!

HAPPY BDAY to Bella Baggins (7/6) and the BIGS (7/13)

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

2 week notice, now you are on notice!

- I got a friend of mine who put in her 2 week notice.  This got me thinking as she was telling me she was still working...WHY ARE YOU WORKING?  Isn't a 2 week notice like a notice that says, you have me for 2 weeks but I ain't gonna be doing shit!  Serious, who expects quality work from a person no longer bound to that paycheck that comes every 2 weeks or so.

- In sports yesterday, the Spurs failed to look at the Pacers V Heat series and pulled out their best rebounder and player last night in Tim Duncan, and watched as the Heats rebounded the ball and made a critical Heart stabbing 3.  Thank you Ray Allen for reminding us all that if you ignore your history, you are doomed to repeat it.

- Kanye is a father.  People are wondering what type of dad he will be.  They are wondering if his latest album is a reflection of his future tenure as a dad.  It's a fucking album and his baby momma has already been pimping the fetus on her show for weeks now.  CLEARLY, it doesn't matter what kind of father he will be because you know she destined for the Pole.

- Chief Keef has been arrested for speeding, and hit with two paternity suits.  If a rapper doesn't live in Northbrook, does anyone hear about this?

- The NSA is currently spying on you.  The government has been doing this every since the words GOVERNMENT were created.  Quit ur bitching and stop worrying that anyone cares that you like to look at porn.  If ur looking up a bomb, or ways to fuck shit up, then you deserve to be spied on and your house raided by Special Forces and guys who are itching to shoot a terrorist.  This isnt a violation of civil liberties, this is what we all bitch about.  Dont believe me?  BENGHAZI...yeah..go complain now.

- Free festivals are all over the city.  Get out and enjoy one.  No really!  Don't sit at home wondering if your kid has ADHD as you let him play on the tablet for 6 hours.  Don't wonder why u have a spare tire and white walls to match as you sit there watching a cooking show with no food in your refrigerator.  GET OUTSIDE.

-iz3y
i am arrogant..why aren't you!

Friday, June 14, 2013

The untold story behind the of the lack of fathers

I know this blog space isn't always the place for the most serious of topics, but since Father's Day is Sunday, this entry is quite timely.


We like to laugh, joke and tease (myself included) about men who have children they don't know about or don't claim, or "baby's daddies" and the lengths they will go to avoid paying child support, but this isn't one of those pieces.  Absentee fathers have a major impact on our communities, and the domino effects that follow are making the world we live in worse.


First and probably most obvious is the impact it has on boys and young men.  While mother's play a significant role in the lives of all children, at some point a boy needs an example of manhood to follow, someone to teach him not only what responsibility is, but what it looks like.  In too many instances, we have examples of dodging responsibility (and subsequently the negative talk surrounding those actions--which have another impact on the child, but that's another subject altogether) rather than examples of sacrifice in the face of responsibility.  Additionally, boys and young men need examples on how to treat women; often this initial impression is made on how the men his mother surrounds herself with treat her.  If the boy/young man observes men smash and dash on his mother, he will believe this is acceptable behavior--after all his mother tolerates it.  Other than the company a boy's mother keeps, an absentee father means a boys only other examples are what the entertainment industry provides--an industry determined to paint men as conquistadors of vagina.  The end result is men who believe women are objects to be used for their instant gratification who don't take any responsibility for the end result that often comes...another child.  And the cycle continues.


Less obvious is the impact on girls and young women.  Because of the above cycle, women are often forced to raise their little girls with a sense of independence.  While that certainly is not a bad thing, when those girls become women, it can negatively impact how they are able to work within a relationship setting (unless of course she finds a man who bends to her every whim).  The whole "I don't need you" attitude is in direct contrast to a situation (i.e. a relationship) that's supposed to be symbiotic--each person relying on the other for encouragement, strength, etc.  What one lacks the other should have...and be readily willing to provide it.  This blurs the line of the roles that each should play, since mom played all the roles solo...so that must mean the girl can play all roles too.  That simply doesn't work where two people are involved--a woman can't be the man and the woman at the same time when there is a man involved.  Women raised without a father also lack an example like the boys above of what a "man" should look like.  This can lead to a lot of trial and error and maybe a few baby daddies of their own.  Perhaps even worse you get a situation that breeds domestic violence--two people raised without fathers who have no idea the roles the other should play or how to treat each other with each trying to "show" the other who's boss (i.e. the girl asserting her independence and dominance; the man trying to assert the same).  And the cycle continues.


We honor single mothers for overcoming many trials to do an amazing thing--raise a productive member of society on their own.  But just because its done every day doesn't mean it should be.  This Father's Day if you know someone who needs to be in their children's lives, encourage them to be active participants.  Because despite all that mothers continue to do, the lack of fathers is hurting our communities more than we can tell on the surface.

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Shit is real, got me feeling ISRAELIAN

On June 3, 2013 the United States Supreme Court reversed the decision of a Maryland Court tossing out a man's conviction for rape, where the primary piece of evidence linking him to the rape was gained incident to an arrest unrelated to the rape.  In doing so, the Supreme Court opened the door to police taking DNA samples from an arrestee.  Non-lawyers everywhere are going nuts about how crazy this is.  I'm here to tell you how crazy it isn't.


I'll start by saying the majority (the five justices whose decision is now law) fucked up.  There is no question that their reasoning is flawed based on other elements of Maryland's statutory scheme (which I won't explore here.  Just know that the court says the purpose of the DNA sample is to help ID people, yet the statute presupposes you already know who the person is since there's information that must be included with the DNA sample when it is taken).  Justice Scalia in his dissent argues that taking a DNA swab is an unreasonable search because the swab is taken for the purpose of investigating another act of which there is no other evidence.  Under the law there must be some idiom of suspicion before a search can be granted, and even then a warrant is more than likely necessary.  But searches incident to arrest do not require a warrant; the suspect is already in custody and assumes the arrest had valid probable cause.  Once at the station the police can ask you to strip, go through your pockets and purse and even ask you to provide a urine or breath sample (assuming you're arrested under suspicion of driving under the influence of drugs/alcohol).  The type of search has to be rationally related to the reason for the arrest; asking someone arrested for battery to get naked, squat and cough is not a search rationally related to the crime of beating someone's ass.  Collecting a sample of the battery suspect's DNA however might be rationally related to the crime of beating someone's ass--that DNA may end up being a valuable piece of evidence should other identification become a problem.


What is glossed over throughout the opinion however is that building a database of criminal information is not problematic.  Building a database of violent offenders post conviction is not an issue; the FBI already does it.  When someone is arrested, it is completely constitutional to take their picture, capture fingerprints, note scars, tattoos or other markings...and add them into a database.  Each fingerprint (and information tied to the prints) are given a unique identifier called an IR number.  The majority opinion suggests that DNA evidence gathered subsequent to arrest is like these other methods (fingerprinting, photographs, etc)...but never argues that the point of doing so was to perform a completely valid reason of building a database of information on criminals.  The majority specifically avoids suggesting replacing fingerprints with DNA, but doing so would have made its decision more valid.


This is where collection of DNA is not crazy.  The state's interest in the cases of people like James Holmes, Adam Lanza and Nidal Malik Hasan is such that it vastly outweighs their privacy rights.  These people allegedly pulled assault rifles out on defenseless people and allegedly pulled the trigger allegedly killing many. I'm pretty sure having a database of nut jobs like these is constitutional.  No not people who may be mentally ill or have a history of mental illness, but a database of people who are charged with crimes against people (aka "violent crimes" although all violent crimes aren't always violent, like for instance burglary).  Collecting DNA in these cases is certainly related to the crime for which they are arrested--it could very well be evidence in that case.  Collecting a DNA sample for a DUI or other crimes against the state or property...not so much.


Everyone should calm down with regard to the police collection of DNA evidence (the FBI and NSA's project to build a face recognition database should be much more problematic).  The collection is certainly a search, but it has to be rationally related to the crime committed.  Better yet--just don't break the law and you should be fine.

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Rantations of a pretty Prince...


1)  So let me get this straight--Chicago Public Schools are being UNDER utilized...yet we just had a teachers strike where the staff alleged that they weren't paid enough and that they needed smaller classes.  The school system is also fiscally broke...yet the city can spend $55 million to help DePaul (a private, religious institution) build a new stadium for its mediocre--no scratch that, HORRIBLE--men's basketball program, and a hotel nearby.  I get it--the money earned from amusement taxes on tickets (if any are purchased) and hotel rooms will make the city a bunch of money.  And the $55 mil isn't real cash, its more "tax credits" where money is actually taken from several sources (or not paid into several sources)--including schools.  But somehow this doesn't seem right.  Money we could use to fund our inner-city-mostly attended by black and brown student-schools is going to fund...a stadium where white people can go and watch one predominantly white, catholic school's team get decimated by another predominantly white school whose entire team is made up of about 50% of their black students.

2)  Folks are up in arms that Dr. Dre gave $35 million to USC to help establish a specialized degree program.  They're mad because as a successful Black man, he chose to spend his money at a rich, quality predominantly white institution, instead of giving his cash to a struggling Historically Black College or University (HBCU) to improve one of those schools.  The argument--$35 million to USC is a drop in the USC bucket, considering that USC's endowment is larger than all the endowments of all the HBCUs combined--including Howard, Morehouse and Spellman.  Now I won't go so far as to say there isn't a need for HBCUs anymore, but there should definitely be fewer.  I'm all about creating as many opportunities as possible for those who otherwise wouldn't get them.  But if those "opportunities" aren't useful, what's the point?  Shouldn't we be more about a quality education these days?  Why support an institution barely staying afloat or able to keep its accreditation?

3)  I don't want to hear another American claim to be thug or gangsta.  Until we get people who will run over someone with their car, then get out of the car with hatchets, and then attempt to chop up the body while the person is still alive...in broad daylight with people watching...and then give a TV interview after...while still holding the hatchet...and not wearing a mask, they aren't gangsta.

Sho-NUFF




Thursday, May 2, 2013

America doesn't like brown people

Not to sound like Kanye West--and by no means am I a Kanye apologist--but he was right.  George Bush didn't like Black people.  The former President of the United States was simply a symbol of the bigger entity--the United States of America.

Make no mistake, we now have a Black President.  Yet the policies of these United States with regard how it treats its own citizens--particularly those born with more melanin in their skin--haven't changed.  Sure he's appointed several worthy Black, brown and yellow people to high posts, but as a whole, nothing has changed.  And you only need one example to see my point.

In Afghanistan--the country we invaded in order to fight a war on an ideology--part of the United States' strategy was to use foreign aid in order to improve the conditions of the people in the country.  The idea: the better the conditions, the fewer "insurgents."  In other words, give the people another option, and they won't want to go join the Taliban.

In America we have gangs who operate in similar fashion to the Taliban.  They don't own any property (or own limited property) yet through intimidation and strong arm tactics "run" certain territories.  They operate outside the bounds of the law--an insurgency if you will.  Arguably gangs don't threaten the "national security" of the United States in the same fashion the Taliban has and allegedly continues to, however they do threaten the security of several communities (Chicago for example had 20 people shot on May 1 alone).

Despite these parallels, the United States continues to push for cuts in domestic aid, while continuing to pour billions in foreign aid in other countries for the purposes of defeating insurgency.  Said another way, providing opportunities at home for young Black and brown people to give them other options than joining a gang is of less importance than providing opportunities to others abroad to dissuade them from joining in "jihad" against the United States.  The domestic idiot with a gun is more likely to kill innocents than some foreign national thousands of miles away--its probably why Chicago hasn't been a terrorist target.  Here in the windy city, we're used to seeing innocent people killed as a result of senseless violence.  Its damn near a daily occurrence.  Militants may want to attack, but figure "damn, they're already killing each other!  What's the point?"  From a media standpoint however, "tragedy" occurs when the innocents are a little..."lighter" complected.

In 2001 the United States made great efforts to strip certain constitutional rights away in order to be able to defeat "terrorism."  These laws sought to find both foreign and domestic threats.  They've been used occasionally--see the attempted shoe bomber, the attempted Christmas Day bomber, and the recent Boston bombing--but I contend they should be used a little more liberally.  Declare the Latin Kings, the Bloods, GDKs, etc. "terrorist organizations" and their members "enemy combatants."  Give the state police and county sheriff's departments the same powers and resources of Homeland Security (broadly covering the DOJ, I.C.E., and the FBI) and let's see what happens this summer.  Giving illegal firearm possession stiffer penalties isn't the answer.  You think criminals are scared of MORE jail time?  That's like threatening Hugh Heffner with busty brunettes if he keeps baggin hot blonds.  The threat of going to jail longer isn't going to stop someone who's already an idiot and looking to shoot up a crowd.  "Man if I pull this trigger I could get 20 years instead of 6..."  Fuck outta here.  Even more hilarious about that idea is jail overcrowding forces the state legislatures (and the feds) to have provisions where prisoners only do a certain percentage of the time sentenced.  "Stiffer penalties" won't get you less stiffs.  Put that P.A.T.R.I.O.T. Act to use and sic the alphabet-boys on these fools.

Yeah I know I should be your monarch,
Sho-NUFF

Monday, March 18, 2013

Holy shit we still have a blog?

As the title explains, I forgot we still had a blog.  Luckily, my good friend SHO-NUFF has been keeping the lights on, the fireplace roaring, and the fridge well stocked with craft beers and the finest meats and cheeses.

SHIT I DON'T UNDERSTAND:

  • Why anyone, ANYONE thinks that it is cool to have conceal and carry in Chicago.  It only solves one, ONE fucking specific problem.  You encounter a situation where a criminal announces himself, and allows you time to pull the gun and fire at said criminal.  It does not in anyway solve the issue of fucking assholes coming to the city and getting all mad because someone keyed their car, grabbed their girlfriend's ass, or losing a fight after stalking someone for three blocks without any fighting skill.
  • Why do people key cars?  My shit just got keyed and I want to pull my concealed nerf gun and go to town.  Thank Jesus I dont own any weapons other than some sweet ass bat-a-rangs my brother bought me.  What is the purpose of keying my car assholes?
  • You ever wonder what goes on in the mind of a guy who builds a bunker in his backyard and hates the government, but loves the flag?  You either...interesting?
  • I have been asked to alert parents (new and experienced) that your life has not ended because you had a child, or 9.  No, it is ok to go out still and have a good time.  Quit telling us that you can't go out because you have a child at home with that "I WILL CALL DCFS BECAUSE YOU ARE OUT" stare.  You're lucky we dont have conceal and carry I tell you!
More to come....Much love people!

-iz3y!

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Finally a stat that matters


Recently on talk radio I heard a discussion about who had hotter women--Jeter or The Artist Formerly Known as Prince Now Known as Prince Again--and realized the discussion is completely arbitrary and subjective.  Also we know way more of Jeter's women than we know of Prince's women, since Jeter tends to date famous women and Prince MAKES women famous.  This discussion was preceded by a discussion of various nerdy baseball stats and I decided why not put these two discussions together to determine once and for all who has the hotter women?  With that in mind I submit to you HAR (Hotness Above Replacement).

HAR should be able to tell us a level of a woman's hotness when compared to another woman given the same physical characteristics (much like WAR takes into account a players performance in multiple categories compared to other players) but also takes into account things such as personality (is she a down ass bitch??), genetics, and earning potential.  For example, Mila Kunis has a higher HAR than Megan Fox because Kunis generally seems to be a better person, doesn't have toes for thumbs (although she does have HUGE eyes) and has higher earning potential than Fox as witnessed by Kunis' ability to land a variety of roles (from comedic to dramatic) and the fact that Fox can't sleep her way into an acting gig if she wanted to right now, mainly because her personality sucks.  Most red-blooded men would never say Kunis is hotter than Fox by any traditional measure--Fox would be a legitimate 7-9 on the traditional "10" scale--but when weighted against possible replacements (Kunis being one example) she's really only average compared to your other brown haired actress types.

Put simply, HAR helps us evaluate what a woman brings to the table other than her looks when compared to another woman similarly situated.  With than in mind I must say Jeter beats The Artist.  Primarily because we actually KNOW who most of Jeter's women are, and because once The Artist's women become famous they are mainly famous for having been with The Artist.  Few of them have any merit on their own beyond their looks.  I guess that's why they call him "The Captain."

Sunday, January 6, 2013

New Playbook


Finally saw "Think Like a Man," the comedy based on Steve Harvey's book "Act like a Lady, Think Like a Man."  Though I've never read the book, I'm pretty confident that this book has ruined the game for single men everywhere.  Steve in fact betrayed us as Kevin Hart's character said.  Well I'm here to re-write the playbook.  Take heed.

1) Pussy is not worth waiting for.

That's right I said it.  If you've already determined she's not worth your time, not worthy of meeting your friends or family, or isn't worthy of having your last name, why the hell would you wait 90--or even 9--days to hit the skins??  What she won't do, someone else will.  Don't waste time trying to conquer.  Lose the ego and move on.

2) Wifey IS worth waiting for.

Contrast to pussy, a woman worth being with is worth waiting for.  Can she walk AND chew gum?  What are HER short and long term goals?  Does SHE have character and morals?  Or is she just a big butt and a smile?  They shouldn't be the only ones with standards.  You meet someone that you might consider giving your last name then you jump through all necessary hoops.

3) She should at least stand up to the standard set by your mother.

Just about everyone's first example of what a woman is is their mother.  I'm not saying a woman should take care of you or keep you safe like your momma.  She should carry herself a certain way though.  Understand her role like your mother.  Be willing to sacrifice if necessary like your mother probably did.  Said another way: she should be "down for you."  If she's not she should be dismissed.  That doesn't make you a mommas boy.  It means she should be a woman--not a girl.

4) Rings are just jewelry

Sure "bands a make a dance" but with the divorce rate over 50%, rings are just jewels; nothing more than trinkets to show off to friends and family.  If she wants a ring buy her one.  Just as long as you're honest with her about what the situation is you shouldn't have a problem.  Shit is just decoration anyways.

Fuck Steve Harvey
Sho-Nuff

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Black Jesus

Back in 2008, this country elected its first Black president.  In the four years that followed, Black people in America sat back and waited for Obama to "do something for us."  Sure he appointed a Black U.S. Attorney, but what else?  Its as if we expected Obama to morph into Jesse Jackson circa 1984--but with a better chance at winning.  We were looking for our savior.

Fast forward to 2012--Black people still wait for Obama to "throw us a bone" (as if the Democratic Party would have nominated this guy in 2008 if he was intent on "blacking out" the White House).  But Obama, in the words of Jay-Z, is off that.  Obama sees the future and it ain't Black folks.

Black people are no longer the "dominant" minority in America.  Sure we blazed the trail for the rest, but we've rested on our laurels of the Civil Rights movement way too long.  It's time for Blacks to realize it ain't just about us anymore.  Check the election stats.  Obama received less than 40% of the white vote, but over 60% of the Black and Latino vote.  Blacks and Latinos together make up about a quarter of the U.S. population, with the Latino population being the fastest growing group in the country.  Within two years Latinos will out number Blacks.  Their birth rates are higher, their incarceration rates are lower (at least proportionately) and theres still that whole immigration thing.  In fact, the same things can be said for just about every racial minority in America (with the exception of birth rates).  The answer then for Black people is to form alliances.

Let's be real: the success of Civil Rights movement has left Blacks feeling entitled.  We did this in the '60s, so it's only right you do that for us now.  There should be more Black federal judges.  There should be a broader safety net.  There should be more government contracts given to minority (read Black) contractors.  And so on and so on.  The problem with this is that Blacks are politically a dying breed.  We don't vote with regularity.  Fewer and fewer Black men are receiving college degrees and more and more are being incarcerated.  Sure we could blame the justice system, but that doesn't explain the decisions that led to any questionable administration of justice in the first place.  With more Black men being convicted felons, that takes away a portion of the electorate (since convicted felons can't vote).  Why invest political capital in a group that's slowly being overtaken by a group that's on the way up?  Obama made his choice, now the rest of Black America needs to make theirs.  If we want Obama to "hook us up" we need to be a part of the group getting hooked up.  That means political (and maybe even economic) alliances with Latino Americans.  Its time to look toward the future and stop living in the past.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Taboo topic...real talk

Whenever I read about how our dealings in the Middle East have some basis in religion I'd shrug it off.  "It's about that oil!" I'd say.  But our national interest in the Middle East (and in other regions in the world) is more about religion than I came to realize.

America isn't trying to spread Christianity like in the days of the Crusades.  And don't let some politician into tricking you into believing that we're spreading democracy either.  America is monotheistic for sure--our trust just doesn't lie with God anymore as our currency would suggest.  America's new religion is capitalism.

I know.  You're all like "good call GENIUS!  DUH!"  Yes I admit I'm slow on this.  It took me reading an interesting book (although a truly difficult read--so difficult to the point that I haven't finished it) called "The Evolution of God."  This book attempts to trace and explain how God has evolved as we have.  The less civilized we were as a people, the simpler our religion, i.e. we were polytheistic.  As we became more civilized--gained understanding of science, etc.--we became more monotheistic.  Certainly we continued to acknowledge the existence of other gods, but through centuries of geo-political struggle (i.e. war) the god of Abraham came to reign supreme through Christianity, Islam and Judaism.  America has evolved beyond God--America now worships the dollar.

What America does now isn't new.  People would conquer and instill their belief system--mainly dictated by their religion--on the conquered in an effort to "improve" their lives.  Even slavery was thought to be a better condition than living as "savages."  America similarly brings "democracy" to nations that were ruled by dictators or the military in an effort to "improve" the lives of the citizenry.  Sure we promote the ideas of democracy and basic human freedoms and rights.  But the main goal, is to bring about free enterprise.  Free enterprise will improve their education.  Free enterprise will provide livable wages.  Both true--both bullshit.

America brings this free enterprise under the guise of a geopolitical struggle, but the entire point is to open new markets.  The point is to sell more goods, to make more money.  This in turn increases the dependency of everyone on money because without it, they can't buy goods.  So they work harder (some) or get more than one job (others) or pump out kids--all in an effort to get more dollars.  The more we put in, the more we get out (or so it's supposed to go).

Compare this to religion.  God supplies all our needs.  The more we praise, the more the blessings flow.  The more obedient we are, the greater the reward.  Prosperity will follow.  People then increase their activity within their various religious institutions and more importantly increase their giving to these institutions.  The more we put in the more we get out (or so it's supposed to go).

This is why America's religion is the most tolerant monotheistic religion in history.  We even have the freedom to choose our own religion in this country--picture someone converting from Islam to Christianity in Iran.  America doesn't care as long as you're a buyer, as long as you keep using that dollar.  Anyone who is a threat to that--a threat to Americans making money--is an enemy of the state.  No this isn't about us hating Muslims or even Muslims hating on Christians.  This is about money--Americas new god.

Sho-nuff

Monday, September 10, 2012

Collective Bargaining is awesome...except when its not.

First let me say that I've never been part of a union, so this piece is written from the perspective of someone who has never experienced the benefits of collective bargaining but certainly understands its necessity in the public sector.

Second, the good and bad of unions is on display in Chicago this week.  In case you missed it, the teachers union which represents the teachers of Chicago's public school system, authorized a strike yesterday after the union could not reach a contract agreement with the city.  The good: there is no way each teacher would be able to command a guaranteed salary increase of 4% each year for the next four years bargaining individually.  The city would simply let go of the disgruntled employee (Illinois is after all an at-will employment state) and hire someone else looking for work as a teacher (or lets be frank: anyone looking for work).  However there's no way the city could let go of 30,000 people who were unhappy about their salary.  Trust me when I tell you that this is a good thing.  (Cut to any and every County employee not a member of a union nodding).

The bad: unions help shelter unproductive or under-performing members generally.  Part of the bargain is the process by which employee-members are evaluated and the process by which their employment is terminated.  There's usually an agreement by which the terminated employee-member leaves with at least a gold-lined parachute.  Maybe it just has gold strings, but the chute itself is still nylon.  The point is, a union employee fired by his/her employer usually leaves with more than your normal at-will employee without a contract, and that union employee is much harder to fire.  Because the point of the union is to protect its members and to extract the most benefit for its members, some employees get away with all sorts of what would under normal circumstances be fireable offenses simply because they pay union dues.

Unions raised the standard of living and the standards the employers had to meet in order to employ us; now employers ship jobs where the standard of living is less than ours and the workplace standards are even lower.  The existence of unions in a "free-market" society is actually amazing since they are generally counter to a free-market.  In a free-market, every employee is paid based on their skill and productivity; with a union those employees are paid based on how long they've held the job, which could really just be a function of how hard it is to fire them despite their lack of productivity or skill.

This dichotomy is on full display for the world to see here in our great city.  The teacher's are striking certainly because they deserve greater pay.  They are charged with the task of educating and planting the seeds of this country's future.  But they're also striking because the new system suggested to evaluate their performance would mean cutting 30% of them, meaning 9,000 of Chicago's 30,000 teachers are failing our children.  That's 9,000 teachers who want pay increases but shouldn't get one.  Its no wonder that by many measures Chicago's public school systems is thought to be one of the nations worst.  Yes the city needs to provide its teachers with the resources they need to do their jobs, in addition to rewarding them for their hard work.  But the teachers need to call out its under-performing members and help the city trim some fat.  Our children deserve better.  Our city deserves better.  Our future and survival as a nation requires better.

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Hypocrisy and politics

Some thoughts on the RNC's keynote address:

1) Anyone who runs for executive office and makes promises to make wholesale changes is full of shit.  Our system of government isn't designed for one office or branch to have power.  It's the SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT REASON why Obama's presidency can be judged a failure--lack of cooperation from the legislative branch.

2) The amount of hypocrisy that came from the lips of the man entrusted by many to be their candidate for president of our country is appalling.  Some may term his final comments a call to unity, but I heard him blame Obama for the lack of unity in this country.  Really?  When the sole purpose of the republican party since January 2009 has been to oppose, block, gridlock, and hate on President Obama?  So is that the reason we have so much disunity because Obama is the president or is he the cause?  Either way, the GOP needs to hold up a mirror when casting blame on America's lack of unity.

3) Mr. Romney is probably much smarter than me when it comes to economics but he seems to misunderstand something.  He is absolutely correct about America needing jobs and that we need to get the private sector to create them.  What he seems to miss (or not say at least) is that private corporations aren't doing the things necessary to stimulate job growth.  In fact they're hoarding profits, rather than reinvesting them in their businesses.  So some entity has to fill that gap.  Unfortunately for the tax payers it's been the US government.

We can debate the tax code for at least a decade and its influence on private corporations' incentive to spend domestically.  But the reality is that a) America became a service economy decades ago and b) it's too costly to build anything here thanks to the high standards the average American expects in the workplace.

Say hypothetically you could get the same quality of burger at Morton's the Steakhouse as you could at say Burger King, with the only difference being BK prepared it in different conditions.  The beef is the same.  The bun is the same.  Toppings equally as fresh.  BK uses a 5' x 5' kitchen manned by a person making $6.50/hr whereas Morton's uses a gigantic state of the art facility where it's chefs are paid six figures.  BK charges $1.99; Morton's $15.99.  BK's profits on burgers are higher because of less overhead.  Who do you think other burger makers, interested in profit, are going to emulate?  Who do you think the America worker wants to emulate?  As a result, guess where burgers are more likely to be made?

4) Romney will win votes among Christians because of his promise to allow God to be his guide in governing the country.  There is a sincere belief by some that if God guides the president, then we will be alright.  There are a couple problems with this theory.  First, the President has to make some tough calls in the interest of "national security," you know like ordering the murder of tyrants, etc.  Last I checked, thou shalt not kill so that'd be a tough call to make no?  Second, this assumes that the United States has divine purpose and promise.  This is the same country built on slavery, disenfranchisement and the oppression of the fairer sex.  The same country where many of it's greatest success stories start with illegal or at least immoral activity.  God's nation according to Christianity is Israel not the United States.  The United States' purpose is NOT divine.  God did not anoint or even bless America; America rose up and took it gangsta style.  The rain falls on the just AND the unjust; just because American has been dominant doesn't make us ordained.  Get a grip and read some prophecy.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

The Newsroom Moment

America is NOT the greatest country on the planet.  That's right--I said it.  America is certainly the worlds best idea, but not its best country.  In an effort not to make this blog entry any longer than it already will be I won't go into the reasons why its not.  The list is simply too long.  Instead I'll harp on one: lack of unity.

See America is awesome because we have "freedom."  There's freedom of speech which allows us to say what we want, when we want with certain obvious limits--like not yelling fire in a crowded public place.  There's the freedom to practice whatever religion you want.  There's supposed freedom of the press so that the electorate (that's the people who actually vote, not everyone that's eligible) are informed when they go to make decisions.  "Freedom of the press" means no government influence.  Unfortunately here in America we have corporate influence--which may be worse than government influence--but I digress.

My point is with all these freedoms, there's one we seem to miss: the freedom to disagree.  This is often lost on the citizenry, mainly because the press acts as an instigator.  Rather than reporting the facts, the facts are often reported on and weighed in on by "experts"--people who either share one view or another to give THEIR opinion.  Soon, you have a handful of blowhards representing the "voice of the people" and by the "people" I mean the group that shares opinion X.  This leads to divisiveness, and thanks to social media--the revolution that brought democratic principals to the globe--it helps spread it like a virus.

As a result the United States is more divided now than at any other time in it's history--and we actually fought a civil war at one point.  I'd even argue that the fight never really ended.  Yeah we abolished slavery, but freed slaves were still second class citizens.  Even after Blacks were given rights by law, they weren't afforded them in practice.  Women were treated unequally even after the Civil Rights movement.  Racism is still alive and well in this country; the targets are just more diverse.  But it doesn't just stop with race and gender.

Our nation is divided on issues that are personal matters (and in some cases personal choices) that are really no one's business.  Race and gender are issues beyond our control.  You're born that way.  But where I buy a friggin chicken sandwich and what my personal beliefs are shouldn't be media fodder.  And if my thoughts and feelings on either issue are unimportant so are anyone else's no matter their fame or position.  These things just don't matter.

Now people want to legislate what they believe and make it law.  We need to ban same sex marriage because its immoral.  Says who?  God?  I'd co-sign that sentiment...except we live in a country where God and matters of state are supposed to be separate.  If you can give me some rational basis that any state or government has to ban ANYONE from marrying who the hell they please then by all means provide it.  What interest does the State have in any of your personal choices (aside from possession/use of drugs)?  Its like the ban on fois gois (sp).  The State can't MAKE people make kosher choices in food.  What makes people think the state can dictate who you can marry?

Furthermore, the state can't then force a private owned business out because the CEO (not even the owner/operator) runs his company based on religious principals.  Private organizations can do that.  The State cannot.  That's the difference.  While this private company is a business that is one of public access (i.e. it can't discriminate), that isn't even the allegation in play here.  No one has said "Chick-fil-a will deny access or employment to anyone lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgendered."  First of all, HOW WOULD THEY KNOW???  Yes some are obvious.  But really, being gay is NOT the same as being say Latino or Asian--you can SEE that someone is Latino or Asian.  Did anyone know Teddy Pendergrass was on the down-low?  NO--at least not until he got in that car accident while getting a hummer from a transvestite prostitute.  But you knew Teddy P was Black.

With Facebook and Twitter blowing up over such issues, they suddenly become newsworthy--to the point that now our news outlets report on them.  HOW IS THIS SHIT NEWS??  What difference does it make what anyone who does not have a direct effect on the personal lives of the citizenry believes personally???  Does it matter what President Obama thinks?  Sure to a degree.  What really matters is what our collective legislatures think, and they'll think whatever the majority wants them to in order to get elected.  But what the majority thinks about personal issues like these SHOULDN'T MATTER.  Because once the state has enough of an interest in my personal life to start to legislate it, freedom goes out the window.  Bet you lack of "freedom" will unify some folks.  It worked so well in the 1860s.

Your highness in waiting,
Sho-Nuff

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Anthony Rizzo walks on water... an undercover report of recent Cubs musing

Let me begin with, as a South Side Sox Fan, it is great that we have this "rivalry" in this city to give us something to do when our teams are not performing well.  It is also amusing to debate Chicago baseball at bars with lifelong fans ping ponging their opinions and views back and forth as biblical fact and then all of us ultimately deciding that with Ditka the Bears would be undefeated in baseball (Chicago thing...come find out).  Recently though, the north side of town has been caught up in a buzz and lathered itself into a fever pitch that has blinded them to the fact they are about to ruin another prospect's career with hopeless and impossible expectations.  If you don't know, the Cubs traded for a player named Anthony Rizzo, a prospect for the San Diego Padres who hit .141 in 129 at bats for the Padres last season.  He is seen as a can't miss prospect due to his ability to .....well hell i am not sure.  Still, the PR campaign is overwhelming so I wanted to share with you a sampling of what I am hearing.

What Cubs fans are expecting Anthony Rizzo to do!

  • Lead the league in Homers, RBI's, Batting Average, ERA, Saves, WAR, WHIP, and if he has time, Walks.
  • Trade Alfonso Soriano's entire contract for a young Major League Star.  It is rumored he will include his batting jersey for Bryce Harper if necessary, and the thinking is the Nationals are strongly considering it.
  • Hit 4th in the lineup and 9th for the pitcher from the opposite side to escape suspicion.
  • Negotiate the Teacher's union strike and make the Mayor and Union happy.  If he has time he may opine on the Firefighter's talks as well.
  • Create more jobs and lower unemployment back to acceptable level (~2.5%)
  • Play 1st Base and cover most of Second Base to allow Darwin Barney more time to chat with Starlin Castro and remind him how many outs there are.
  • Remind Starlin Castro how many outs there are since Darwin isn't doing his job
  • Step in as the new hitting coach by being the only player taking batting practice so the team can mimic his swing.
  • Destroy Twitter and raise Facebook's stock value
  • Draft up a new strategy to combat the shootings in Chicago and address the mob actions in River North.  He will also put more police on streets while lowering cost.
  • Raise property values as a whole in Chicago as people flock to see him.
  • Rebuild Wrigley overnight to include luxury suites, more seating, more space for ads, a JumboTron, and create outdoor festival space on Sheffield and Waveland by building and underground passage on those two streets by Saturday or at least before the Blues Brother's screening.  He will also do this so that Wrigley faces the city and the residents will allow for night games (something about a soundproof force field).
  • Help get Obama elected and get Rahm off their back.  
  • Provide diversity and sensitivity training to the Wiener Circle staff
  • Eliminate PEDs from Baseball, Football, and water Polo.
  • Clean up the Chicago river so we can swim in it...not that he will need to since he will be walking on it.
That is a short list of what I am hearing coming from the north side so this will be an interesting Summer in Chicago.  Wait, i just heard Rizzo will be extending summer in Chicago to at least 8 months out of the year.  If you hear anything else please share!  We on the Southside will be practicing our YOUK! chants and may even use them in person.

-iz3y!



Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Day one of being a sports DAD

As a kid, having my dad in the dugout with me during games was awesome.  We didnt chatter during the game because he was my coach and that would be weird.  Instead he would just coach me...in spanish...and only spanish.  it would always start with "mijo..." and i would go out there with visions of MLB glory and try to do what he told me.  I always knew he was going to be the toughest coach and the most supportive and it was cool.  What i never gave any thought to, or spent any time on was what the parents in the crowd were doing.  I knew my mom was out there somewhere and that my sister, forced to come to my game, was sitting there wondering what was so great about this stupid ass game, but I never cared.  My dad would always tell me watch the game.  Pay attention to the game.  It was always about the game on the field, the chatter in the clubhouse and everything else was there to be ignored.  (personal note: the announcer announcing my name for the first time was kinda hard to ignore because it was so cool!).  As I grew up this never left me.  My family will come to games now and my Bells and awesome lilMAN will sit there and i focus on the game as they ....well i have no idea what they do except the occasional wave of support.  It is not because I don't appreciate them, but because that is what I do.  FOCUS ON THE GAME.  Watch how the fielders are set up.  Is the RF sleeping?  Is the 3B too far back?  What chant are we going to use to throw this pitcher off his game?!?!

Now i am on the other side of the metal fence that separates the game from the spectators.  I am not the coach or even the volunteer.  I am the dad that got his son ready and told him to run to practice because he was already late, and "you can't be late".  I sat as close as I could to hear the coach talk, but that got weird.  I am not the coach, so I had to move away.  I met parents, I talked to other coaches, and i glad handed so much my political friends would be proud of me.  It was great watching my boy opening up, running, and having a great time.  I just stood there watching him and enjoying it. Then i wanted to tell him to get to that passing lane.  I wanted him to show off his incredible speed and powerful left leg.  i wanted him to thread passes and play 'D' like the little monster he turns into when he wants the ball.  Instead I spent the time shutting up, talking about other people's dates and glad handing!  Twice, the dam broke and I gave some dumb obvious instructions and twice I had to shut the hell up embarrassed because I didn't want to be that dad.

I remember when my dad hung up his spikes to be my coach.  He wasn't even 30 yet, and he waved goodbye to Harrison Park and talking shit with his teammates.  I remember no longer watching him play, but him watching me play and coaching his boy on the game we loved.  We sat in those dugouts and practiced on those dirt fields and it was awesome!  I never knew how my mom felt until now.  She watched a sport she knew nothing about and kept it pretty cool while doing it.  If you know my mom, you know it had to be hard not to yell at umps and opposing players!  Now it is my turn to get my player ready and tell him how important it is that he is on time.  Tell him to focus on the game.  Listen to your coach, talk to your teammates and be a part of a team.  My responsibilities are to get my folding chair, the water bottles, and orange slices and join my fellow parents straining to keep it cool.  This is day one...oh man this is going to be a fun ride!


-iz3y!
Soccer DAD!

Monday, March 19, 2012

THings I think I think Vol 6

Whats up bizznitches.  Its me, Jokey Jokemaker.  This week I had these thoughts:

1)  Ismael Julio Lopez's attempt to take the blog and put it on facebook was really really really lame. 

2)  Tim Tebow got screwed in the ass so hard, he may be pregnant and give birth to a politician.  Peyton Manning waffled, and the fates of several NFL franchises hung in the balance.  The 49ers were left with no quarterback, the Dolphins were left with the scrub from last year, and Alex Smith was left with the leftover scraps of Manning, Flynn, Quinn, Campbell, Henne, and a ton of other quarterbacks that signed quickly. 

3)  So the New New York Knicks coach runs a crapload of iso's for Carmelo, and all of a sudden team chemistry is better? 

4)  One hot weekend, 10 shootings.  All it takes is a bit of warm weather for the Wiz Khlaifas to come out.  Wix Khalifas and people who most likely would vote democrat.  Wix Khalifas, Democrats, and people who tattoo names in old english font.

5)  Whitney Houston is still dead.  But she will always love me.

6)  Mayor Emmanuel is moving to make some tech high schools, 6 year schools.  the last two years would be college coursework.  ITS CALLED COMMUNITY COLLEGE PEOPLE!.  People are walking around like Rahm invented Calculus.  The true genuis was not getting everyone to go to college by calling it something else, the genuis was in getting big Tech Firms to fund it.  Bravo

7)  Quick financial lesson to my daughter who said that the more somthing costs the better it is.  I told her "The government we have is the most expensive ever, and they cant even pass enogh bills to keep the country going for more than 3 months at a time. "  Expensive is not best.  Then I explained quality.  Since I could not find any examples of quality in Government, I chose to use steak.   Choice cuts are always tastiest, but not always most expensive.  The most expensive steaks are the ones with the mike symbol on them.  Nike sells almost everything.

8)  Pretty soon, ticket cameras will begin to put Chicago Police officers out of work.  New cameras will be able to get vin info off your dashvboard at 60 mph.  They will also be able to spot if you have a seatbelt on.  BEFORE YOU START trying to collect money for every fine you can think of, how bout you use these cameras to find the killers of the 6 year old girl in Little Village?

9)  There is a new show coming called Chicago Mob Wives.  I am already bored of it.  I bet though the show will be generic and dull as all the other reality tv.  I sure hope though, that  they find enough Italian old women, desperate to cling to their fading looks and sagging tits to fill the show.  Where oh where will we find enough brash women married to gangsters to go on tv and say shit like OMERTA/ Know the code/Cosa Nostra/whaddya kiddin me?/Fugeddaboutidit/you never go against the family/you're dead to me/etc.     The real mob was based in secrecy, and the thought of a mobster snitching to the cops to get off, and then hve his wife go on a show a publicise their secrets, has to make all those fat greasy mobsters roll over in their graves.  I am reminded of the geto boys lyric:  "real gangsta-ass niggas don't flex nuts, cause reall gangsta-ass niggas know they got em."  

10)  The Bears made big moves, and the Bulls wisely resisted making biug moves.  The blackhawks should follow suit, and we should all be inspired to pack the cubs off and send them to Seattle, so a rich guy can buy themm and move them to Oklahoma and make them great.

11)   The more i think about it, the more it feels like Romney is stringing along Santorum, until just before the Convention.  Then, Santorum, Paul, and anyone else will be easily eliminated setting a final showdown between Romney and Obama.  This will be one of the most depressing final showdowns ever.  Obama has sucked. i mean really really bad.  Call it a racist government, too much charisma, too little knowledge, a bad streak of luck.  The president has not gotten shit done.  The answer sure as hell not another 4 years.  The answer is sure as hell not Romney.  At this point, I am ready to to hire the quality control team of Toyota motor company.  They have been streamlining processes and making quality products for years and years and years and years.  I am sure we can take those same ideas to our government and get better results.  At the very least we can get rid of a few jerk politicians, and improve it year to year.      

     Thats it for now guys.

Jokey Jokemaker

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

We need a new word for 'wack'


Sometimes, something is so terrible, there are not words to describe it. This here is a list that embodies that idea: here is listed the top five wackest rappers of all time. To meet this criteria, the rapper had to acheive great financial success and fame, yet not possess the skills to justify the success. We're talkin big record deals, bitches, the whole nine. So without further adeu, the worst rappers of all time, in order:


1. Baby a/k/a Birdman
While most of his money has been made as the head of Cash Money Records, this coonegro has the nerve to continue to put out his own stuff, much like Puff (n/k/a Diddy) did in the 90s. But even Puff was better than this clown. Ladies and gentlemen, your wackest of the wack!


2a. Juvenile
2b. Master P
Am I just hating on southern rappers? I guess we'll see in a few. Doesn't matter if I am or not--bottom line these dudes sucked.


3. Rick Ross
Okay so I'm hating on southern rappers. Sure they spit to hot beats bitches like to get naked to in shady establishments, but there's really no reason we should reward them for sub-par abilities. Would you pay your doctor illions (yeah you read that right--insert your own first letter) if their skills were sub-par? NO! So why do people attend concerts and buy records featuring wack MCs???


4a. Soulja Boy
4b. Tyga
Pretty much the same dude. Soulja Boy taught us to Superman hoes, and Tyga introduced us to Rack City Chicks. Both high quality examples of coonery.


5 Gucci Mane

Nuff said.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Mourn someone who matters.

Joe Paterno passed away this past Sunday at the tender age of 85.

People will mourn his death no likely but not me. I don't care if his wife is crying. I don't care if his children are sad or if his grandchildren are wondering when Grandpa Joe is coming back from heaven to visit him. Their tears have no meaning. They have no substance.

For a man who is supposed to mold children into men he failed to do what a responsible adult would do. He failed to take care of the children. The children he possibly one day could have coached. The children who one day could have helped expand his "legacy" as the winningest football coach in NCAA history.

Like it or not that is what a coach is. A father figure to those football players he took in as young men. From the ages of 18-22 those men look to their coach for leadership, guidance, and advice. And he failed. Miserably.

He failed everyday for almost 14 years. He failed everyday to correct a mistake he made. He could have woke up one morning and decided to take more action. He could have decided that a man who raped children being put in prison was more important than saving the reputation of Penn State University. He could have told an actual person whose responsibility it was to protect and serve the people of Pennsylvania but he chose not to.

After the first incident, in 1998, he saw his friend with children around campus but did nothing. After the grad assistant came to his house in 2002 he still did nothing. Again, he still saw him walking around campus with children after 2002 and once more did nothing. Let me correct myself. After 2002 he did something. He did the absolute minimum, legally.

I wonder if he would have allowed his grandchildren to sleepover Sandusky's house? Sleep in the special rape room he had set aside downstairs? Would he have helped his grandchild when they screamed for help while Sandusky raped them? Or would he have looked the other way like Sandusky's wife did?

This was an 85 year old heavily Catholic man. A man who supposedly never heard of a man raping a boy. Remember, an 85 year old Catholic man who never heard of a man raping a boy. Didn't the Milwaukee, WI archdiocese file for bankruptcy due to all the money they've had to pay out for hmmm what was it again? Oh yeah, men raping little boys.

I am not celebrating this man's death. So spare me the Martin Luther King quotes about celebrating people's deaths. But I do not mourn his death. The tears his family shed should be shed for what he failed to do. Their father/grandfather looked the other way when his good friend was raping children. Those children deserve the tears. Their lives are ruined because a leader of men did the absolute minimum when it came to protecting this world's most cherished asset. The children.


He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it. He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it." - MLK

Saturday, January 21, 2012

America: Land of the free, home of the entiteld

I recently read an article about how Apple (and other of America's most successful companies) outsources its manufacturing, such that few if any of the products sold to Americans are made in America.  Of course there was talk about now "nimble" and "flexible" the factories are and how "skilled" the workers are abroad, and there was definitely talk about how the labor is "cheaper."  But the article (as well as any discussion about outsourcing) failed to discuss the elephant in the room: the attitude of entitlement among Americans.

The article pointed out an example about the iPhone and how there was a design configuration change at the last minute (six weeks before the launch of the phone) and a plant in China was able to not only implement it within 24 hours, but it also began pumping out 10,000 iPhones a week.  The interesting part about the example for me was the fact the factory was able to implement the change within 24 hours because the workers are housed in dormitories at the plant, they worked 12 hour shifts, they were awakened in the middle of the night to work, and fed a biscuit and tea--as if to say "this should tide you over.  Now get to work."  There was a quote--something about no other facility in America could have done such a turn around and produced so quickly.  Well there's a reason for that, and it has nothing to do with the fact our workers demand higher wages or that they aren't trained or skilled enough to do it.

Sometime around World War II, there was a shift among the attitudes of American workers.  They demanded that their employer treat them--and pay them--with respect.  They demanded certain working conditions, refused to work over a certain amount of hours per day or week and put limits on the ages of our workers.  It was then that manufacturing in America (and the middle class it created) began to decline.

After decades of federal and state regulation setting standards in America's work places, there is definitely not a plant in America that could have done what the plant in China did for the iPhone.  Workers aren't living in rooms at the plant.  They certainly are going to want more than a biscuit and tea for breakfast, and they'll be damned if they're working 12 hour shifts for six straight weeks without getting paid overtime.

According to the article, President Obama asked Steve Jobs what it would take to bring those jobs back to the US.  Jobs said (inaudibly to the POTUS) "Those jobs are never coming back."  Damn right they aren't--especially since the workforce those jobs would employ in America would rather collect government aid than subject themselves to the same working conditions as the Chinese, Indians, Koreans, Taiwanese and others that have those jobs now.  Get on the train to elitism or die a broke muthafucka; there's no in between anymore.


The meanest, prettiest, the baddest low-down mofo around this town,
Sho-NUFF