Obviously Jenifer Lopez is not getting it.

Dear ass,

     Its me, your papichulo, and I am madder than I was last week.  I talked to you about how you can make your life better, and I thought you listened.  You tilted your head, and nodded, so I assumed i made an impact on you.  You did, however totally misunderstand about the pearl necklace I said I wanted to give you, so maybe I should have expected this. 

Jennifer Lopez has a very much deserved reputation for being an insufferable bitch, and today Life and Style provides even more proof by reporting her demands for anyone applying to be her new assistant.


“The person has to be graceful under pressure, have a thick skin, and be resourceful in foreign countries.”
“You’ll be expected to travel at a moment’s notice and must know how to adjust in each city.”
“The job is 6 days a week, at least 12 hour days with one day off, but you may not get off for weeks.”
“You’ll be on call 24/7 and you’ve got to be organized and always on point.”
“You have to change diapers, work on little sleep and cook if the butler is away.”

The pay for being a slave toepisodes of racing across town at 3am to change her kids diapers? $55,000 to $65,000 a year. Best case scenario, if you get the 65 a year and only work 72 hours a week, that’s 17 dollars an hour. To get yelled at because you didn’t fold her giant underwear into the shape of a eagle. With gas at 3.20 a gallon, 17 bucks wouldn’t even cover the gasoline I would need to buy to set her on fire.

These crazy requests come ont he heels of news that Jennifaa isn’t completely out of the running as the third judge for American Idol. I doubt that will happen because that delusional bitch was demanding 20 million a year plus she wanted Fox to pay for her the army of assistants and hair and makeup experts. She typically spends 8 grand a day just on makeup. “She costs too much money and doesn’t sell enough,” one person said, and that was back in 2007 when she was relatively popular. These days one of her concerts would be so barren and deserted that Survivorman guy could film a show there. These days her concerts would be a lonely as a "I love Johnner" party. 

Jennifer, please, get over yourself.  That ass is a timebomb, and you will not win against old age and gravity. 

JokeyJokemaker316
Papichulo