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HAPPY BDAY to Bella Baggins (7/6) and the BIGS (7/13)

Friday, July 1, 2011

theREVIEW of BAD TEACHER

Well I had to go see it with the crew of T.G.ED and Bella and what can I tell you.  Well I could tell you that I could have waited for the DVD or even a few weeks down the road when I was caught in a rainstorm and need to use the Movie theater for shelter.

See it was funny, but it wasnt all Hangover Part 1 or Part 2 or even the ill fated sequel starring Ryan Reynolds funny.  No, it was funny because it seemed like they finally took the filter off CAmeron and her potty mouth was pretty cool.

BEST LINE OF THE MOVIE: "Pull down your pants because I am going to suck your dick like I am angry at it"

The rest of the film was ok.  The crazy Chick (Lucy Punch from Dinner with Schmucks - a must watch) was cool and pretty right on with her crazy.  They did a great job of focusing on her extremely versatile facial expressions that seriously give off a meat clever in bed vibe.  She went out there and did what she could to save this movie, but she was the backup dancer and not the star.  AND NO ONE PAYS TO SEE THE BACKUP DANCER!  This isnt Inglorious Bastards where Christoph Waltz was given the opportunity to steal a film which he did to the tune of an OSCAR.  No this was more like Eminem's back up MC outshouting EM with his own lyrics.  As for Justin...oh lord man.  You are funny.   I know this, or thought I knew it based on your stints on SNL.  In this movie you werent even watchable except for one scene where u dry hump your ex.  Even then...barely watchable to unwatchable.

The rest of the movie plays out as only these movies can.  There are a ton of foul mouth lines concerning blow jobs, racking and the my favorite scene the gratuitous shot of a an amazing pair of boobs.  The actresses's name isn't even important since the boobs were CLEARLY the star of that awesome 2 minute scene.  The plot was fairly straightforward, in that Cameron is a gold digging slut who cheats her way to a bonus to pay for a pair of said delicious boobs, finds lust, and gets away with scamming a state test.  All fairly neat and concise and total nonsense.  I mean, creating a woman by using a computer and a barbie doll seemed a touch more reasonable.  Hell, the nonsense that is a civil union v marriage seems more straightforward, but hey...in both cases it did draw a laugh.


Rating: 1.5 out of 5
Go see this if ur girl wants to go because it will give you AMPLE time to try to feel her up.  You can also use some of the lines in the movie as a "joke" to portray your real intents..."hey babe, should i pull my pants down...right?  right?  what you think...you know, u can be angry at it.   Get it?"

1 comment:

JokeyJokemaker316 said...

you watch the gayest movies.