Eat it Terrel Owens

Love or despise him, no one can deny Terrell Owens was one of the best.  Sure he was a big fat whiny bitch, who was tolerated long enough to make a team with shitty wide recievers into a team with less shitty wide recievers.  Sure he became a media whore, and sure, once teams realized that he had bad hands and dropped several towuchdowns a year, everyone realized that the sooner he got the hell out of the league, the better off it would be.  But no one can deny the simple fact that Terrell Owens was in the top 1000 Wide recievers to ever play in the NFL.

Ever.

I mean, I would be hard pressed to find 999 names better that Terrell Owens.  Jerry Rice?  Hell yeah Jerry Rice was better than T.O.  Chris Carter, most definitely.  Devin Hester?  No way.  Owens cemented himself as a great. His 156 touchdowns are good for fourth ever, according to gofuckyourselfterrell.com. His 1078 catches are sixth best all-time. Owens amassed 15,934 total yards in his career, second only to Jerry Rice’s 22,895.


For all the ridiculous touchdown celebrations, for all the sit ups in his drive way, for every episode of his horrid reality TV show, For every jackass attempt to cry over quarterback criticism, for every half-assed attempted to mug for the camera by eating popcorn, shaking pom poms, or standing on the Dallas star, Owens was still a hell of a player.

Owens’ greatness, though, came in an era of uncanny success for NFL players. Six of the top ten all-time receptions leaders played the majority of their careers in the first decade of the 21st century (Tony Gonzalez, Marvin Harrison, Isaac Bruce, Hines Ward and Randy Moss accompany T.O). Four of the top-10 receiving yards leaders and five of the top-10 touchdowns leaders all-time were of the T.O. era.  Almost all of these receivers will go in before Terrel Owens.  In fact , one can almost picture the fucking dog and pony show that will accompany the T.O Hall of Fame Ceremony.  I picture marching bands, Midgets, and cirque du Soliel. 

And then there are their quarterbacks. Peyton Manning will go down as one of the greatest NFL arms of all time. Manning ranks third all-time in passing touchdowns, completions and yards and fourth in attempts. Brett Favre owns nearly every passing record (the good ones and the bad ones). Despite never finding a real home, journeyman Kerry Collins comes in 10th all-time among passing yards leaders, with Tom Brady and Donovan McNabb not far behind. Brady’s three Super Bowl wins in four appearances guarantee him a spot in Canton.

LaDainian Tomlinson is second all-time in rushing scores, fifth in rushing attempts and sixth in rushing yards.  Jason Taylor, Michael Strahan and Simeon Rice rank in the top-15 for sacks all time.  Ray Lewis is headed towards the all-time tackles record, while Brian Urlacher looks to join the Raven in Canton.

Yes, it’s been quite an era.

Unfortunately, Owens’ unattended workout Tuesday may signal the end of his career.
He did not get a sniff from anyone.  He at least got a 400/week offer from the arena league.  As long as he does not pull a Latrell Spreewell, he should be fine.  You know who was better than T.O, WAY BETTER?  MARVIN HARRISON, and if that motherfucker could not get a job, what makes T.O think he can get a job coming off of knee surgery.  Its not the Knees T.O, people are leery of your bitch ass behavior.  You can rehab knee, but not a whiny attitude.  And for those of you who say "Look at Micheal Vick,  he did it,"  I say "Micheal Vick could fall out of a boat and miss water." 
Like Owens, the futures of most of the greats from his era face uncertainty as to whether their careers will continue. Manning hopes to find a miracle cure for his faulty neck, Tomlinson has been relegated to a spell-back role. Taylor’s impact has been greatly limited. McNabb may have lost his final starting job. Favre looks to finally be gone for good.

Sure, it’s exciting to see the young stars take over leading roles – Aaron Rodgers took over for Favre, Arian Foster, Darren McFadden and Adrian Peterson replaced Tomlinson as the league’s premiere backs. Andre Johnson, Calvin Johnson and Larry Fitzgerald look poised to follow in the footsteps of those receivers of the T.O. era.
Still, the last 10 years was an unprecedented era of greatness, and one can’t help but to feel a little nostalgic as these player’s times wear down and our opportunity to watch them preform ends.

Yes, that even applies to T.O.
so here, is my last Fuck You to you.

"Here's to you knowing that out of sight equals out of mind, FUCK YOU T.O!  HAPPY RETIREMENT!"