Red snapper is no joke

What does my title have to do with anything...fuck if I know. All i want to discuss today is that 'JACKASS MOMENT'. You know what I am talking about. IT is that moment when you go, "oh shit..i am an IDIOT!" My friend Roly will always be 'Johnny on the Spot' with that line whenever i do something. I will grab my keys and forget my wallet = "you're an idiot!" I will forget to bring my music to a party = "You're an idiot!" I go out and run over a bum with my car = "You're an idiot!" This is his specialty, and he is really good at it.

Anyway, when you have a JackAss moment what do you do? I say go big. GO REAL BIG. Make the joke first, act out the scence again only add more special sounds and effects so that it leaves no room for anyone else to get their shot in. Kinda like when Rabbit busted on POPPA Doc in 8Mile. Actually, dont do that, because i am still not sure why Poppa Doc didnt get on the Mic and start extolling how he fucked B-Rabbit's mom (the trashy hot Kim Bassinger) or how they all gang banged his women in the studio before he came in. I digress....

My top "I am a JACK ASS" Moments:

• My shirt rips at "Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat" [hilarity ensues when Jokey re-enacts for 4 straight hours]
• I forget to write my speech that I was supposed to deliver to my entire School...[hilarity ensues when the other guy gave a riveting speech quoting MLK jr, and Jokey re-enacts it for 4 straight hours.]
• Love Letters - they are bad ideas after break ups...trust me. They are kept, regurgitated, analyzed and in essence great fodder for jokes. [hilarity will ensue when after 18 years they are brought up, but really why would u still have them? ]
• Racing to leave a fight to be safe, yet getting into an auto accident whilst doing it
• Every dumb ass drunk text i have sent [really my phone should be equipped with a breathalyzer and/or spell check. ]
• Cutting my arm with a fish bowl...
• Dislocating my shoulder not 40 min after i said it was impossible to do it again because of the SCREW in my shoulder!

So that is me...my forehead slapping moments...Please feel free to add ur own....

D'OH
-iz3y!

Keri Hilson - Turnin me On